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Write-Offs: 07.11.13

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$$$US and EU seal landmark derivatives deal [FT]

$$$Surprise! Huge US Budget Surplus Shatters Record [Reuters]

$$$Jon Hilsenrath Is Not Who You Think He Is [BI]

$$$This Is What It Looks Like to Meditate Outside Goldman Sachs [DI]

$$$Schism among Satanists on abortion issue [NYP]

$$$Trader Thompson Made Eurobonds Woman’s Best Friend Before Crash [Bloomberg]

$$$Big Payout by Moelis May Whet the Appetite for More [DealBook]

$$$Microsoft Shake-Up Aims to Speed Products [WSJ]

$$$China central bank office mobbed by borrowers seeking free loans [Reuters]

$$$ "I mean, we’re about to visit royalty on Alderaan. We can’t have some situation where we’re at dinner and the queen asks us, 'So, how was the trip?' And you pipe up, 'Fine… except for the goddamn Sand People.'" [McSweeney's]

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$$$ Yahoo Sales, Profit Top Estimates Amid Mayer Turnaround [Bloomberg] $$$ Farallon’s Founder to Leave by Year End [DealBook] $$$ BofA-Merrill Hires Top Broker From Morgan Stanley [Deal Journal] $$$ The World Financial Center will be renamed "Brookfield Place" [NYO] $$$ Marissa Mayer's baby is named Macallister Bogue [Fortune] $$$ Sorry, nerds: Popular kids earn more in the long run [WonkBlog] $$$ William Blair is recruiting for an Analyst - Special Situations & Restructuring to join the Corporate Finance team in Chicago [DBCC] $$$ Is Mary Schapiro leaving the SEC soon? [FBN] $$$ CLOs stage comeback in US [FT] $$$ McSweeney's has a financial economist talking about debt [McSweeney's] $$$ "Is he a Columbia asshole or a Harvard asshole? The answer is important, because those are two very different types of asshole. Both are obsessed with showing you how smart they are, but the Columbia asshole does it by telling you everything he knows, while the Harvard asshole does it by acting bored with whatever you say. The Harvard variety is at least laid back, and the Columbia variety can be interesting; but put them together and you have a world-weary pest." [NR via IvyGate] $$$ Heinz Counterfeiting Operation Ends in Ketchup Explosion [Grub Street]

Write-Offs

Write-Offs: 07.13.12

$$$ U.S. investigates whether JPMorgan traders hid losses [Reuters] $$$ Was JPMorgan's restatement actually an elaborate plot to get Ina Drew's comp clawed back? No? [Felix Salmon] $$$ Fed May Need To Begin New Asset Purchases, Lockhart Says [Bloomberg] $$$ Ex-Mets star Dykstra pleads guilty in bankruptcy fraud case [NYP] $$$ "You have to sit there in silence, and you just get up every day and beat your head against the wall," but for that (and ratting out Countrywide) they'll pay you $14.5 million [Reuters] $$$ Q&A: The Gourmand Behind New York's $666 'Douche Burger' [BW] $$$ Deutsche Bank is looking for a VP-level Group Finance COO business manager [DBCC] $$$ Spanish Bank Borrowing from ECB Surges [WSJ] $$$ Italy sells debt despite downgrade [FT] $$$ Visa, MasterCard in $6 Billion Settlement Over Surcharges [WSJ] $$$ Wealthy Homeowners Brace for 'Mansion Cliff' [CNBC!] $$$ Attention Cable and Satellite Subscribers: This Network Is Being Dropped Because Your Provider Is Being a Giant Douche [McSweeney's]

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Write-Offs: 5.11.16

Ackman says "material progress" has been made at Valeant; Rubenstein surprised macro hedge funds failed to spectacularly; Key West police rescue woman from giant banyan tree; and more.

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Write-Offs: 08.08.12

$$$ Ex-UBS Traders Offered Deal by U.S. in Rate Probe [WSJ] $$$ The history of the invention of Libor [Reuters] $$$ British MPs accuse US of anti-City agenda [FT] $$$ Why investors should avoid hedge funds [Reuters / Felix Salmon] $$$ "Brazilian central bank employees staged their first work stoppage in five years today ... demanding an average pay increase of 23 percent to compensate for inflation since June 2008." [Bloomberg via Slate] $$$ Pole Vaulter Realizes It’s Not His Day As His Pole Shatters Mid-Vault [Deadspin] $$$ J.P. Morgan is looking for a Java developer to work on interest rates derivatives pricing [DBCC] $$$ Carbon Credits Gone Awry Raise Output of Harmful Gas [NYT] $$$ "I propose an expanded system of company registration under which companies would have to trade in private markets for a seasoning period, with mandatory disclosure, before they would be allowed to sell their shares to the public at large." [Harvard Law] $$$ On retail vs. institutional investors: "As for small investors vs. little guys, there’s a difference. If you have enough money that you’re investing it through brokers, I personally don’t count you as small, even if you appear small to Goldman Sachs." [Mathbabe] $$$ A Hundred Horses Are Ford’s Pride After Flipping Tainted Banks is really a Bloomberg headline [Bloomberg] $$$ Beck's next album will be released only as sheet music [McSweeney's]

News

Write-Offs: 02.25.13

$$$ Italy Vote Shows No Clear Winner, as Berlusconi Rises [WSJ] $$$ Goldman to begin fresh round of job cuts [Reuters] $$$ Remember That $83 Billion Bank Subsidy? We Weren't Kidding [Bloomberg, earlier] $$$ "There appears to be a growing trendin dying industries: The bosses want to hold their bedside vigils in private." [Deal Journal] $$$ Banks to sell complex CDS books [IFR] $$$ "As an excellent student with advanced people skills and an exciting resume, with a desire to be part of a challenging, energetic, and reputable organization, I will be a valuable addition to The Catholic Church as your new Pope." [McSweeney's] $$$ A top-tier investment management firm is looking for a VP, behavioral finance specialist in New York [DBCC] $$$ Wells Fargo Role in Heinz Deal Is Credit Negative, Moody’s Says [Bloomberg] $$$ Leveraged loan market on fire [Sober Look] $$$ Banks Face Key Hurdle in Libor Fight [WSJ] $$$ RBS plans IPO for U.S. arm Citizens in next two years [Reuters] $$$ John Kerry Brings Democracy to Kyrzakhstan [DI]

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BofA sees big things for the year 2025; Russia; High-speed trading in peril; "$17,500,000 underground bunker for sale in Georgia"; and more.