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Write-Offs: 08.13.13

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$$$U.S. Agrees Not to Prosecute 'London Whale' [WSJ]

$$$Fed's Yellen Says Stance on Banks Hardened [WSJ]

$$$SEC wins dismissal of lawsuit over handling of $7 billion Stanford fraud [Reuters]

$$$Ackman said in an interview with Charlie Rose recorded today that his investment in J.C. Penney so far has been a “disappointment.” “We got too much credit�� for hiring Ron Johnson, when it was the entire board’s decision, Ackman said. “And when the business failed, I probably got too much of the blame.” [Bloomberg]

$$$Here Are Two Young Women Digging For Cronuts In The Trash [Gothamist]

$$$U.S. Shrimp Producers Get a Win With Trade Ruling [WSJ]

$$$Seth Klarman, other hedge funders behind likely Cory Booker win [HFI]

$$$ While handcuffed in the back of a patrol car following a drunk driving arrest, the 23-year-old Floridian attempted to urinate out the window of the moving car, an audacious effort that failed miserably when Langford “misaimed” and showered the cruiser’s interior with urine, according to the police report. [TSG]

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$$$ Bank Earnings: J.P. Morgan and Wells Fargo Preview [Deal Journal] $$$ JPMorgan Analysts Say Big Investment Banks Are ‘Uninvestable’ [Bloomberg] $$$ The state of investment banking today: Morgan Stanley’s definitive guide [eFC] $$$ To trade or not to trade, when the Fed sends you inside info [Reuters] $$$ How Do You Run Goldman Sachs Out of Town? [DI] $$$ The Winklevii have a lot of bitcoins [DealBook] $$$ Top Bankers Agree with Obama: Recovery Coming [FBN] $$$ Lisbon struggles to avoid second bailout [FT] $$$ Singer Denial Failing to Quell Win-Win Charge: Argentina Credit [Bloomberg] $$$ A New Look at the Role of Sovereign Credit Default Swaps [IMF] $$$ UBS cap intro chief Rob Sachs jumps to Bank of America [HFI] $$$ Man Tries to Saw Off His Arms at California Home Depot [ABC]

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