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Write-Offs: 05.12.14

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$$$U.S. seeks up to 6-1/2 years in prison for SAC's Steinberg [Reuters]

$$$Bankruptcy Judge Approves Quiznos Restructuring Plan [WSJ]

$$$ “Fish stinks from the head down, more precisely, that’s the head of CEO Brady Dougan,” Ernst Schmid, a shareholder wearing a traditional Swiss edelweiss shirt, said at the bank’s annual meeting, calling for the chief executive officer’s resignation over an investigation into whether it helped Americans evade taxes. “Management always tries to sweep things under the carpet, but it’s no longer possible to hide.” [Bloomberg]

$$$Soaring prices for tech startups stir bubble fears [NYP]

$$$I Spent a Night at the Urban Cowboy, Williamsburg’s Hip, New Western-Themed Bed and Breakfast [DI]

$$$Hedge fund titans are testing the quality of US democracy [FT]

$$$Nasdaq Hires Friedman as Co-President, Likely Front-Runner to Be Next CEO [WSJ]

$$$Iowa distillery raises pigs to taste like whiskey [WQAD]

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$$$ Jack Lew sworn in as Treasury secretary [Reuters] $$$ JPMorgan CEO Dimon: 'We Need a Big Plan' [FBN] $$$ Hedge fund in 'Whale' trade tried to poach JPM employees [Reuters] $$$ JPMorgan Traders Lost on 41 Days as ‘London Whale’ Unwinds [Bloomberg] $$$ "After four and a half intense and wonderful years as CEO of Groupon, I've decided that I'd like to spend more time with my family. Just kidding - I was fired today." [CT] $$$ Telepathic rats solve problems together [FT] $$$ A major investment bank is looking for a sector coverage head for Food/Consumer/Retail commercial banking [DBCC] $$$ Bank of China Eyes Expansion Into U.S. Securitization [WSJ] $$$ US watchdog set to weaken derivatives rules [FT] $$$ Girls Gone Wild is bankrupt [NetNet / John Carney] $$$ Regional jets really suck [WSJ] $$$ Maxine Waters: 'Over 170 Million Jobs Could Be Lost' Due To Sequestration [YouTube]

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$$$ Nasdaq, Carlyle Discussed Deal [WSJ] $$$ Investing in Water Good Long-Term Bet, Goldman Head Says [Bloomberg] $$$ U.S. judge speeds up schedule in Apple vs Einhorn case [Reuters] $$$ Here you can read a debate about central banking and bubbles [Free Exchange, Money Illusion] $$$ Sports Illustrated Celebrates Launch of the 2013 Swimsuit Franchise by ringing the bell at the NYSE [NYX] $$$ A leading boutique investment bank is looking for a Healthcare associate or VP in New York [DBCC] $$$ Porsche Manipulation Probe Extended to Supervisory Board [Bloomberg] $$$ Bank of New York loses bid for $900 mln tax benefit [Reuters] $$$ RBS chairman says CEO's pay is "modest" [Reuters] $$$ Maker’s Mark Is Watering Down Its Bourbon [Grub Street]

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$$$ Here's Warren Buffett's shareholder letter [BRK/A] $$$ JPMorgan No. 1 Investment Bank Amid a Flurry of New Deals [Bloomberg] $$$ Goldman Sachs trims risk-taking to lowest level in 7 years [Reuters] $$$ Look Out, Wall Street: The Goldman Sachs Partners Ball Is Back [DI] $$$ Groupon CEO Andrew Mason's severance: $378.36 [CNN] $$$ An investment bank is looking for a head of investment advisory compliance in New York [DBCC] $$$ SecondMarket to Launch Student-Loan Securities Platform [WSJ] $$$ Give us a formula, Argentina [FTAV] $$$ MBIA flags 'going concern' doubts, liquidation risk for unit [Reuters] $$$ New York Men Looking for Sequester Sex on Craigslist [DI]

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$$$ Germany Takes Hard Line on Spanish Banks $$$ Wall Street pay: Headed up or down? [Unstructured Finance] $$$ Bank CEOs Fear the Fiscal Cliff They Apparently Don’t Understand [DI] $$$ Swaps Rule Sends Wall Street Into Clearing Limbo [Bloomberg] $$$ "One visitor recalls a family ritual: Every night at around 9:30 or 10:00, Mitt and Ann would meet at the foot of their staircase, clasp hands, and escort each other upstairs to the bedroom, in full view of their brood." [TNR] $$$ Tim Tebow Has Officially Trademarked Tebowing [Deadspin] $$$ A global investment bank is looking for a director for Financial Crime Compliance [DBCC] $$$ Cries of abuse grow with use of complex U.S. stock orders [Reuters] $$$ SocGen to Sell Its Greek Bank [WSJ] $$$ Happy birthday Fox Business! [TBN] $$$ "Why does the male nude get no respect?" [WSJ] $$$ The Psychic Friends Network Cannot Predict Its Future [Bloomberg View]