Write-Offs: 08.29.14

Author:: Dealbreaker
Updated:: Jan 14, 2019
Original:: Aug 29, 2014

$$$JPMorgan Hack Said to Span Months Via Multiple Flaws [Bloomberg]

$$$Ukraine Invasion Claims Wipe Out Russia Bondholder Gains [Bloomberg]

$$$Brazil Falls Into Recession with Second Quarter GDP [Reuters]

$$$ A Midtown landlord is taking cramped city living to new heights — by renting a 2 bedroom apartment with 22 beds, according to a video posted online. Hawking what appears to be an illegal hostel, the apartment owner touts the “amazing location” for “young professionals” on 27th Street and Third Avenue. [NYP]

$$$Woman Discovers Her Cat Is Cheating On Her, Living Double Life [HP]

$$$That's it for us today! Enjoy the holiday and we'll see you back here on Tuesday!

$$$1 percenters bullish on US despite ‘failed’ Obama presidency: Wien [NetNet]

$$$Hedge Funds Hunt for Clues in Treasury Tax-Inversion Limit [Bloomberg]

$$$Flight Diverts to Boston Over (Another) Reclined-Seat Upset [AP]

$$$ Germany Pushes EU Bank Oversight [WSJ] $$$ Goldman CEO testifies at Gupta insider trial [Reuters] $$$ Lawyer Kluger Gets 12-Year Sentence For Insider Trading [Bloomberg] $$$ Lisbon to inject €6.6bn into largest banks [FT] $$$ Giant Prehistoric Insects Shrank To Escape Developing Birds [Bloomberg] $$$ PIMCO is seeking a Cash, Short Duration, and Income product associate in Newport Beach [DBCC] $$$ Stock Market Could Bounce, but Look Out Below [CNBC!] $$$ Dealer corporate bond inventories continue to shrink [Sober Look] $$$ HSBC tests cash machines in Athens for drachmas [ThisIsMoney via NYO] $$$ Bernie Madoff’s son and future daughter-in-law are desperately trying to land a downtown apartment but can’t — because building owners don’t want to be associated with them. Andrew Madoff and Catherine Hooper have tried to cover up their connection to the Ponzi schemer by making appointments under Hooper’s name. She then shows up alone to view the $20,000-per-month pads, brokers said. Hooper speaks generally, saying the space is for her, her fiancé and their children, the sources said. But once the brokers explain who Hooper is to the landlord, the couple is immediately rejected, the sources added. [NYP]

$$$ As His Fraud Trial Opens, Ex-UBS Trader Is Accused of Brazen Gambling [DealBook] $$$ Thanks, Goldman, for Giving My Peers Their Lives Back [Bloomberg] $$$ FDIC’s Hoenig Wants Simpler Rules Than Basel III [Deal Journal] $$$ Occupy Wall Street's one-year anniversary demonstrations start tomorrow [The Awl] $$$ Hard-money types talk too much about the gold standard, not enough about the bacon standard [CNBC] $$$ "I'm kind of a Snooki fan. Look how tiny's she's gotten. She's lost weight. She's energetic. Just her spark-plug personality is kind of fun." - Mitt Romney [DI] $$$ TIAA-CREF is looking for an insurance wholesaling director in Boston [DBCC] $$$ Miller Says U.S. Should Issue Simplified Volcker Rule [Bloomberg] $$$ Private equity needs more strategic deals [Term Sheet] $$$ Home Depot is leaving China, "where cheap labor has stunted the do-it-yourself ethos and apartment-based living leaves scarce demand for products like lumber" [WSJ] $$$ Allocating Risk Through Contract: Evidence from M&A and Policy Implications [Harvard Law] $$$ Naked German monk found wandering Bavarian forest after tripping on some bad berries [NYDN]

Preet Bharara's no good very bad day; Winklevii bitcoin exchange comin' at ya; Twitter; "A Japanese man live-streaming his video game session online purportedly set fire to his apartment by accident as his webcam continued to broadcast"; and more.

Cliff Asness didn't like the rich hedge fund manager list; The legal tweak that led to disaster for Lending Club; SnapChat founder buys Harrison Ford's old house; Virginia woman pole dances for her 100th birthday; and more.