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Artists Formerly Known As Hedge Funds Try Hand At Rebranding, Do Even Worse Than A.F.K.A.P.E. Funds

This is not to say "Carefully Considered Investment Products" doesn't have a nice ring to it.
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"It's catchy, right?"

Remember back when Tony James did a little brainstorming about how to make private equity funds sound less evil, and came up with “clarity equity”? And how you thought, nothing could ever be worse than that, not even “Point72 Asset Management”? Well, Bill Ackman and friends are trying their hands at distancing themselves from the public perception of what a hedge fund is and, well, it’s worse.

Baupost Group LLC, Och-Ziff Capital Management Group LLC and Pershing Square Capital Management LP are among the industry stalwarts looking to change the script. In communication with clients and public filings, they have ditched the term “hedge fund” in favor of catchall descriptors such as “alternative asset manager,” “investment holding company” and “private partnership.”

Those are actually some of the better ones. Baupost is going with “a series of investment partnerships,” while Cliff Asness likes the slightly-less-cumbersome “Diversified Asset Management Company,” which has the added benefit of being so broad as to be essentially meaningless. But Och-Ziff’s “Carefully Considered Investment Products” is beyond doubt the worst, and not just because it’s not fooling anyone’s olfactory senses.

“If it looks like a hedge fund and smells like a hedge fund, it’s a hedge fund,” said Brad Balter, an investor in hedge funds at Balter Capital Management LLC in Boston.

Hedge Funds: Don’t Call Us a Hedge Fund [WSJ]


People Still Launching Hedge Funds Faster Than They Can Fail

Well, the numbers are finally in for 2012 and it was, relatively speaking, a bloodbath for hedge funds, with more going to their grave or down the drain than in 2010 or 2011. But there were still 235 more hedge funds at the end of the year than at its beginning, because those who have previously shuttered a hedge fund due to their failure to raise/make enough money gave it another go last year. Look for more of the same this year, as fresh-faced and not-so-fresh-faced hedge fund managers hang out a new shingle for a few months, only to find out that investors are only interested in having Ray Dalio manage their money.

By Keith Allison [CC BY-SA 2.0], via Wikimedia Commons

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By Photograph: en:User:Anubis3Medal: Gustav Vigeland (Self-photographed) [GFDL, CC-BY-SA-3.0 or Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

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