Veronica Vain Has A Business Proposition For You

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Earlier this year, a Lazard Asset Management intern named Paige A. Jennings decided her time on Wall Street had run its course, and she was ready to dive into another industry: adult entertainment. Before she packed up her things, she took a few photos of herself in a Lazard bathroom in varying levels of undress and posted them on the internet, where they gained some attention, as these things tend to do.

Now she goes as Veronica Vain, and while some people in her position might be content to simply play the role of performer (in titles such as "Screwing Wall Street"), Ms. Vain is wearing another hat: Serious Businesswoman. Earlier this week she told Charlie Gasparino she's got all kinds of plans for monetizing herself and yesterday she took to Twitter to release an open letter to potential partners who'd like to engage with her in an official capacity. As her feed is decidedly

    NOT SAFE FOR WORK

, we've reproduced said letter here:

An Open Letter to Edgy Executives From Veronica Vain

Dear beleaguered executive,Are you looking for new avenues of exposure or a new way to get more eyeballs on your product? Are you looking for an innovative way to engage your customers and build stronger brand awareness and loyalty? Have you been thinking about something novel you could do to shake things up and draw attention to your product and image?Even if your answer to the above is no, I still urge you to keep reading.In case you were wondering, yes, I’m talking to you Monster, Rockstar, Vice, and American Apparel. I’m also talking to the executives of alcohol and tobacco companies who may have difficulty getting in touch with target demographics due to mainstream marketing barriers. And if you answered yes to any of my initial questions, I’m also talking to you. Pampers, you may wish to move along. It’s nothing personal.My name is Veronica Vain. You may have heard of me — I made an unexpected career change from finance to adult entertainment.I have an offer for you. You see, with minimal investment on your part, I can get you tens of millions of views on your product, and I can follow that up with heavy analytics letting you know who is looking at it and from where. I can offer this through a medium that most people utilize at least a handful of times a week. For men of the ages 18-55, it’s probably more than a “handful” if you catch my drift.Of course, there are many media that offer the above. So what’s so special about my deal? The answer is what you all want the most from your advertising, but which mainstream media have had difficulty delivering due to content constraints. I can give you content customized specifically to your brand and integrated within the performances of major household names. I can make them speak to the greatness of your product while they throw their heads back in pure ecstasy. And I can do all of this while allowing you to develop a relationship with a consumer during one the most private, attentive times of their day. I can do this more cheaply than those views would cost in just about any other medium. How? Because I already did it.With the help of my colleagues and sponsors, I already proved that integrated product placement in adult entertainment works, and I already did it with a mainstream company. Together, we wrote and developed a feature movie around a single brand for less than the cost of seven magazine ads. A 13 minute clip of that movie received two million views in less than two weeks with minimal promotion. The brand in question is ArrangementFinders.com, a subsidiary of Avid Life Media, known best by its AshleyMadison brand. They are a company with over 140 million in annual revenues. Since the debut of this clip, the website experienced a nearly 700% increase in website traffic against its trailing 6 week moving average, and an over 400% increase in membership sign-ups, which is converted to revenue.I can offer you myself or any other adult entertainment star who "tickles your fancy" to engage with your product. I can offer you a vast distribution network, millions of views and complete control over how you are portrayed. Further, everything is up for negotiation. There are no constraints. Unless of course, that’s your thing you Christian Grey wannabe.One mainstream company already had the balls to take the plunge, and they reaped the rewards.Do you? If so, I hope to hear from you.

Sincerely,
Veronica Vain a.k.a “The Wall Street Porn Star”
theveronicavain@gmail.com

Earlier: Wall Street Intern Turned Adult Entertainment Star Offers Career Advice

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