$$$ IMF, EU clash over Greece's bailout prospects [Reuters] $$$ No Prison Time Likely For Accused Manhattan Madam [WSJ] $$$ U.K. authorities arrested a former Credit Suisse investment banker on Wednesday in connection with U.S. allegations that he and others at the Swiss bank conspired to inflate the values of mortgage bonds during the financial crisis. [WSJ] $$$ U.S. Banks’ Leverage Should Be Halved to Cut Risks, Bair Says [Bloomberg] $$$ Man pulled over by cops blames reckless driving on pet squirrel [DM] $$$ Hong Kong Tycoon Seeks Husband for Lesbian Daughter [GP] $$$ Bank of America VP Called Seahawks’ Disputed Touchdown Pass [Bloomberg] $$$ Rumble On the Docks: Contract Pits Pinstriped Pinheads Against Roughneck Roustabouts [NYO] $$$ Poll: Romney Ahead in Presidential Race, Say Replacement Refs [New Yorker]

$$$ Schaeuble Declares Markets Wrong As Europe Heads To Vacation [Bloomberg] $$$ Don't Force Banks Into 'Draconian' Breakups: Whitney [CNBC] $$$ Morgan Stanley Stock May Be Worth $32 In Breakup, Mayo Says [Bloomberg] $$$ The Merkley plan to refinance underwater mortgages sounds pretty good [Reuters / Felix Salmon] $$$ Outspoken Analyst Kinnucan Pleads Guilty in Insider Case [WSJ] $$$ Man who rescued a 17-pound lobster "felt the nearly 100-year-old crustacean did not deserve to die with its parts soaked in butter. 'If he was 100, he saw World War I, World War II, man on the moon,' he said. 'Being in New England, he even saw the Red Sox win the World Series. So, he didn’t deserve the boiling water.'" [CBS] $$$ Due to recent regulatory requirements, a top bank in Charlotte is looking for a counterparty credit risk manager to be a Basel expert [DBCC] $$$ Libor scandal makes it more costly for bankers to get insured [Reuters] $$$ Europe Aims to Make Rate Manipulation a Criminal Offense [DealBook] $$$ Fund managers to lose securities lending profits [FT] $$$ The Securities and Exchange Commission drew sharp criticism from a federal judge who said they have failed to properly oversee a $55 million investor education fund created by a nearly decade-old settlement with Wall Street banks. The fund had been created as part of a roughly $1.5 billion regulatory accord in 2003 with Citigroup Inc, Goldman Sachs Group Inc, JPMorgan Chase & Co and other banks accused of publishing biased analyst research. U.S. District Judge William Pauley in Manhattan said the SEC has shown a "lack of oversight" and "indifference" toward how a nonprofit organization charged with distributing the money has been managed. ... Pauley pointed as an example to a two-year, $91,500 grant to the Genesee District Library in Flint, Michigan, that appeared to have resulted in just two events, one of which concerned "spending, sharing, and saving" for children ages two to five. "While there may be benefits to starting investor education early, toddlers seem beyond the pale," the judge wrote in an order issued Wednesday. [Reuters] $$$ Mitt Romney would restore 'Anglo-Saxon' relations between Britain and America [Telegraph]

Greece's problems; Banco Espírito's problems; John Paulson's problems; "Sweaty Spider-Man Costume Transforms Street Brawl Into Cinematic Spectacle"; and more.

$$$ Greek Aid Payment Call Won’t Be Made Next Week, EU Official Says [Bloomberg] $$$ Dexia Gets a New Bailout [DealBook] $$$ Obama Victory Leads Wealthy to Make Quick Pre-2013 Moves [Bloomberg] $$$ "The ECB is playing a more complicated game than old fashioned 'loose money to counteract downturns, tight money to counteract inflation' monetary policy. And you have to ask yourself: Is it working? Has this delivered prosperity?" [Slate / Matt Yglesias] $$$ The guy who was going to fire all of his employees if Obama got elected, gave them a 5% raise [BBW] $$$ Priceline.com Impulsively Buys Kayak During Mini Existential Crisis [VF] $$$ JPMorgan is looking for a high-net-worth banker in Chicago [DBCC] $$$ JPMorgan Cleared for $3 Billion Stock Buyback [DealBook] $$$ Libor rates cull proposed for April [FT] $$$ Consulting Firm That Once Advised Gadhafi Enters Chapter 11 [WSJ] $$$ Here you will find a review of Atlas Shrugged [The Awl] $$$ "As he wended his way toward proposing an April trial date for Christopher's claims and Tory's counterclaims, Strine reflected on the (in his view) unwarranted popularity of 'duck boots,' the mysterious utility of the Topsiders his son just bought and the strangely bright colors of WASP-preferred styles." [Reuters] $$$ "'Paying bills,' Mr. Adelson said on Tuesday night when asked by a Norwegian reporter how he thought his donations had been spent. 'That’s how you spend money. Either that or become a Jewish husband — you spend a lot of money.'" [DI]

Lloyd Blankfein blamed for Goldman Sachs’ ‘lost decade’; I quit JP Morgan and ended up winning two Grammy awards; Manspreading at work is good for your health; Mayor Accused Of Stealing 111 Road Signs; and more.

$$$ Euro-Zone Leaders Step Up Greece Contingency Plans [WSJ] $$$ Facebook Banks Said To Make $100 Million On Stabilizing Stock [Bloomberg, earlier] $$$ The Modest Worth of Big Banks [NYT] $$$ Cardiff Garcia on Brad DeLong on Walter Bagehot [FTAV] $$$ "While we’re on the subject, we’d be remiss not to note that Mr. Muniyappa wore jeans and an untucked plaid button down, prompting New York Times legal eagle Peter Lattman to poll observers on the last time they’d seen a witness take the stand without a necktie. 'Maybe not at the trials The Times covers,' a wiseacre snapped." [NYO] $$$ Stress! An Energy Source Of The Future? [The Awl] $$$ "Representing the sovereign in these affairs is just more fun. It is a mixture of politics, finance and law, and theater," [sovereign restructuring lawyer Lee Buchheit] said. Buchheit recalled an Asian finance minister - referring to her only as "The Iron Lady" - resting a hand on his arm as tension mounted at 3 a.m. in a marathon meeting and saying: "I know you'll get us through this." [Reuters] $$$ UBS is looking for a credit stress testing analyst in Stamford [DBCC] $$$ China plans brokerage reforms to create its own Goldman Sachs [Reuters] $$$ In defense of private equity: Japan [Noahpinion] $$$ Romney Can’t Explain What He Learned in Business [DI] $$$ ALF Creator Paul Fusco Thinks ‘Timing is Right’ for an ALF Movie [Gawker]

Ex-Goldman banker acquitted in rape case; Ex-UBS banker working with drones; Ex-Fed Chairman will limit himself to 2 hedge fund consulting gigs (plus blogging job); "Trooper In Trouble For Snoop Dogg Photo Sues Bosses"; and more.

Greece deal reached; Hedge fund tears Sotheby's a new one; "Yellen Confronts Economists’ Ignorance"; Thin Mints shortage; AND MORE.