$$$ More Probes Add to Barclays's Woes [WSJ] $$$ Corzine Searches for What's Next [WSJ] $$$ London Whale’s Boss Martin-Artajo Sued by JPMorgan [Bloomberg] $$$ “The growth in [European government bond] futures volumes is unbelievable,” said one senior credit trader. “The same short interest still exists – economically it’s identical. If you thought the short interest was hurting the market then it makes no sense to say cleared derivatives are good and OTC derivatives are bad.” [IFRE] $$$ Remember: it's not Halloween if you're in New Jersey [nj.gov via Counterparties] $$$ Dear College Kids, If You Dress in an Ironically Racist or Insensitive Costume, You May Get Punched In the Nose Like I Did [Gawker Updates] $$$ A private equity firm is looking for an associate in San Francisco [DBCC] $$$ When Is There a Strong Transfer Risk from the Sovereigns to the Corporates? Property Rights Gaps and CDS Spreads [NY Fed] $$$ Citigroup Staff Uprooted for Weeks as Sandy Slams Wall Street [Bloomberg] $$$ On Mayor Bloomberg's sign-language interpreter: "The perception that we non-signers have that these hand movements and facial expressions are particularly 'animated' and 'expressive' is precisely due to our lack of experience with them as linguistic features." [LL] $$$ Bloomberg on hurricane sushi, part 2 [BBW, earlier] $$$ Baby walrus rides out hurricane at NYC aquarium WITH VIDEO [MSNBC]

Twitter earnings; Greece, Standard Chartered seen better days; Convicted insider trader sentenced to jail sentenced to more jail; "Naked Idiot On The Field Absolutely Flattened By Rugby Player"; and more.

Fed probably won't do anything next week; Citi trader says bosses loved wrongdoing; "Man angers neighbors by shining 'alien' fighting spotlights"; and more.

$$$ Facebook Posts Loss, But Emphasizes Mobile Growth $$$ LightSquared Executives Get $6 Million in Bonuses Approved by Judge [Deal Journal] $$$ Bernanke QE3 Stocks Miss Greenspan Irrational Exuberance [Bloomberg] $$$ ‘I’m Quite Concerned About Fiscal Cliff’: Greenspan [CNBC] $$$ Argentina won't kneel down before 'vulture funds,' says Cabinet Chief [BA Herald] $$$ Gupta is no Rajaratnam. Gupta tipped inside information about one company to Rajaratnam, while Rajaratnam traded on confidential information collected from many sources. So you’d expect that Gupta would be treated differently when he appears for sentencing. Federal sentencing guidelines, however, suggest a prison term for him that’s similar in length to the 11 years Rajaratnam is serving. And prosecutors want a sentence within those guidelines, just as they want for the hundreds of defendants sentenced in federal courts nationwide every day. Because what Gupta and Rajaratnam did is so different, though, sentencing Gupta to anything like the time Rajaratnam is serving undermines the whole purpose of the sentencing scheme that prosecutors say they want to uphold. [Slate] $$$ For several years now, Marc Lasry, the co-founder of Avenue Capital, has decorated his mansion on East 74th Street with bloodied bodies hanging from the balcony, skeleton heads, a giant inflatable ghost, swinging bats and a life-size, clothed skeleton affixed to a tree on the sidewalk. One afternoon last week, tourists and children gathered to take pictures of a dancing skeleton beside the front door. It was singing “Super Freak.” (Perhaps in the spirit of competition, the hedge fund manager Philip A. Falcone and his wife, Lisa Maria, have lavishly decorated the exterior of their 27,525-square-foot house on East 67th Street even though it is currently a construction site.) [NYT via BI] $$$ Adveq, a leading asset manager investing in private equity and real asset funds globally, is looking for an investor relations and development representative for North America [DBCC] $$$ Former Soros CIO nears launch of Anderson Global Macro early next year [AR] $$$ Wall Street Is Rethinking Commodity-Trading Role [WSJ] $$$ This is a story about LBO companies getting equity financing from long-only investors to pay down debt to manageable levels before an IPO [Term Sheet] $$$ This is a story about a management consultant who is also a self-published poet [BBW] $$$ "My wife ... penetrated to the heart of the debate in a single sentence tonight when, only about 15 minutes into the exchange, she observed: 'Romney’s flag pin is much larger than Obama’s flag pin.'" [NR] $$$ Obama Takes Out Romney With Mid-Debate Drone Attack [The Onion] $$$ NYC-Based Soup Chain Offers Free Cup of Soup, Personal Service from a ‘Cunt’ Named Mary [Gawker]

The Johns Hopkins class "guaranteed" to get you a job on Wall Street; Dick Parsons says US economy is like "World's Tallest Midget"; Greece; Too big to jail; "Nude final outrages San Diego student's mother"; and more.

$$$ "Congratulations: you’ve now taken a business which was earning 5 per cent to negative 10 per cent. Well done! Now what’s your next trick?" - James Gorman [FT] $$$ Barclays Names McGee Top Americas Corporate and Investment Banker [DealBook] $$$ Viking and ValueAct have outperformed the market YTD, but the median hedge fund return through August is 4.13% [AR] $$$ Game Over: Dave & Buster’s Withdraws IPO [Deal Journal] $$$ "It was the third alligator found roaming free on Long Island in less than a week." [Newsday] $$$ A reader writes, "I know getting drunk and crashing cars into houses on Long Island has been a big fad this year so I figured I'd share." [Newsday, earlier] $$$ A European investment bank is looking for a junior rates trader in New York [DBCC] $$$ Deutsche Bank seen hardest hit by Liikanen reforms [Reuters] $$$ Hard money and the gerontocracy [Noahpinion] $$$ Barry Ritholtz is sick of all the people who are just in finance for the money [TBP] $$$ Gawker recaps a Hulk Hogan sex tape [Gawker] $$$ "But is having your head in a plush diver helmet simply too dorky for the workplace?" Possibly [BusinessWeek]

Steve Cohen; Aramco IPO; Worst week ever; RZA on Shkreli; and more.

$$$ Europe stimulus rift crisis etc. etc. [FT] $$$ Corporate Profits Just Hit An All-Time High, Wages Just Hit An All-Time Low [BI] $$$ Wells Fargo's mushrooming mortgage risk [Reuters] $$$ Investors cast doubt on "end of world" hedge strategies [Reuters] $$$ Rajaratnam Wiretaps Catch ‘Chunky But Funky’ Goldman Salesman in Scandalous Act of Doing His Job [DI / Kevin Roose] $$$ This is a good post about quants [Mathbabe] $$$ "Europe’s highest court ruled that workers who happened to get sick on vacation were legally entitled to take another vacation." [NYT via MR] $$$ A leading investment bank is looking for a manager of High Frequency Trading development [DBCC] $$$ The Bank of England is now posting collateral on derivative trades [FTAV] $$$ ‘Orwellian’ Goldman Loses Bid to Dismiss Suit Over CDO Deals [Deal Journal] $$$ President Obama Can’t Be in the Same Room As Forks Anymore? [DI] $$$ When your soccer team loses, you feel down and are therefore more inclined to sell securities in the markets [SSRN, related?] $$$ Germany 4 - 2 Greece [NYT] $$$ Just Thinking About Having a Drink Can Help You Relax [CNBC]