You'll Have To Excuse Brian Moynihan If He Feels The Urge To Jerk The Wheel Into A God Damn Bridge Abutment Every Time He Drives Down The Road

The Bank of America chief's internal monologue right now is probably going something like "Forget it, I quit, I can’t do this anymore, man. My head’s about to explode. My whole life sucks! I don’t know what I’m doing, I don’t know where I’m going. We just killed Bambi and I’m out here getting my ass kicked!"
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In December 2009, outgoing Bank of America chief Ken Lewis introduced his successor Brian Moynihan to the troops by describing B-Moy as the only guy who actually wanted such a thankless job. Sitting on the stage alongside fellow BofA brass, Moynihan probably thought to himself, "Ooo, burn Ken Lewis. But you know what? Things can only get better from here."

OH HOW WRONG HE WAS.

Though he held things together for the next 11 months, never letting it slip that he was cracking under the pressure of running a bank that would would amass over $71 billion in fines from Countrywide alone, where no one ever thought to say "Hey Brian, nice job today," or "Moynihan, you're doing great work here," or "Hang on a second, buddy...have you been working out?", by November 2010 he couldn't keep things inside anymore. Thinking he was among friends at the Bank of America Merrill Lynch Banking and Financial Services Conference, Moynihan took the opportunity to let the crowd know what up-at-dawn, pride-swallowing siege of a nightmare being CEO of Bank of America was, describing the job as "day-to-day, hand-to-hand combat."

And things did not get better from there! Recent offenses have included:

So while this latest slight might seem but a drop in the bucket of sh*t on Moynihan's head, it's really not something he needs right now.

Bank of America Corp. ranked worst among its peers in retail customer satisfaction in states where it has the most branches, California and Florida, according to an annual survey by J.D. Power. As consumer sentiment toward the industry improved, Bank of America fell further behind competitors, according to the survey released Thursday. The second-biggest U.S. lender ranked last in four of 11 regions this year, including the Northwest and Southeast, compared with two in 2014. Chief Executive Officer Brian T. Moynihan, 55, assumed more direct oversight of the firm’s consumer bank in August when former co-Chief Operating Officer David Darnell was appointed vice chairman.

If you need him he'll be in his office screaming into a pillow.

Bank of America Least Loved in Places Where It’s Best Known [Bloomberg]

Related: Brian Moynihan Is Having A Tough Time; Jesus Has A Bone To Pick With Brian Moynihan; Bank Of America Knows You Think Brian Moynihan Sucks; You Gotta Get Up Pretty Early In The Morning To Buy www.brianmoynihan.sucks Before Bank of America Does; Bonus Watch ’14: Bank of America CEOs (Make Less Than Their Underlings)

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