Foreign exchange manipulators, come on down!

(Allegedly) rigging the London Interbank Offered Rate doesn't leave a lot of time left over for coming up with creative nicknames for your co-workers, but next time let's try to do a little better.

Those rate rigging penalties aren't going to pay for themselves.

A sushi boat? MAYBE.

Ten years ago, Carl Icahn hired his son Brett to be an analyst at Icahn Enterprises and the kid didn't fuck anything up so he got to keep his job. Two year ago, Carl gave Brett and another employee, David Schechter, $300 million to invest under the "Sargon portfolio," and the guys returned 96 percent (before fees) through June. Last month, Carl tossed the duo an additional $3 billion and a contract that expires in 2016, at which time Papa Icahn will either officially Brett a worthy successor or offer to serve as a reference for his next gig. Under a 46-page legal agreement filed with federal regulators last month, Brett Icahn and Schechter will get to invest their boss’s capital in companies with stock market values between $750 million and $10 billion. The deal may free the elder Icahn, who still has final say over many aspects of the portfolio, to focus on larger targets for shareholder activism. Brett, who turns 33 this month, along with Schechter has been running $300 million for his father, who owns more than 90 percent of Icahn Enterprises LP, a holding company with $24 billion in assets including activist investing partnerships as well as the Tropicana casinos, an oil refiner and an auto-parts maker. The arrangement expires after Carl turns 80 in 2016, giving Brett the chance to both prove his mettle as a successor and develop a track record to start his own hedge fund. After hiring Brett as an investment analyst a decade ago, Icahn allocated the $300 million to his son and Schechter in April 2010 to invest in loans and securities of companies with less than $2 billion in equity value. Their investments, internally dubbed the Sargon portfolio, generated a gross cumulative gain of 96 percent by the end of June, according to a July 27 filing with the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission...“These two guys doubled our money over the last two years,” the elder Icahn said in an interview. “You can’t complain about that.” Carl Icahn Hands Son Brett $3 Billion To Prove His Mettle [Bloomberg]

As you may recall, over the summer, former Barclays CEO Bob Diamond resigned in disgrace after revelations that bank employees had engaged in rampant rate rigging on his watch. And while the scandal clearly had an affect on his last performance review, Bob and friends o' Bob will be pleased to hear that it didn't actually hurt him too badly come pay day! In addition to a couple million pounds (for half a year's work), it was announced today that Diamond's 2012 package also includes lodging while he's visiting old colleagues in town, as well as a company car and driver. No need to see the guy reduced to dirtying his hands opening door or walking, when he's already been through so much.