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Write-Offs: 5.29.15

Bill Gross's Bloomberg keyboard to go on display at Smithsonian; Jacob Lew tells Greece they might wanna get a deal done; Dick Fuld blames everyone but Dick Fuld; "Man takes bullet to groin to prove strength of sports cup"; and more.
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Write-Offs: 1.27.16

Inside Traders Look to U.S. Supreme Court for Redemption; Deutsche cutting 1/2 of Brazil team; Fed holds line; Customs says man smuggled live birds in fanny pack, groin of pants; and more.

Write-Offs: 5.28.15

Dick Fuld is back; Greece still has no money; Hostess is worth $2 billion; "A quarter of Harvard grads have never gotten laid"; and more.

Write-Offs: 2.26.15

Bond crisis coming; Herbalife's "come back"; "Is Business School Gutting the Economy?"; Edible coffee cups; Llamas; Owls.

Write-Offs: 4.27.16

Ex-Citi exec claims whistleblower mistreatment; Marissa Mayer dodges bullet; So it turns out my dead father worked in porn; and more.

Write-Offs: 04.30.12

$$$ Here are Dick Fuld's call logs from March through September of 2008. Tim Geithner, Hank Paulson, Lloyd Blankfein, Jamie Dimon, Ken Lewis, Rodge Cohen, Raj Rajaratnam ... [Jenner] $$$ The quants and derivatives traders of Occupy Wall Street [WaPo] $$$ Spain in talks over ‘bad bank’ scheme [FT] $$$ [@JeffMacke] $$$ Duke University grad doesn't want to waste her unique talents working on Wall Street, works in management consulting instead [DealBook, earlier] $$$ A leading M&A boutique is looking for a class of 2011 or 2010 FIG associate [DBCC] $$$ Large layoffs loom on Wall Street [Fortune] $$$ SEC Charges Mother, Daughter, and Their Attorney in Illegal Penny Stock Scheme [SEC] $$$ Barnes & Noble’s Nook Unit Is Worth More Than Its Parent Company [DealBook] $$$ “If mortgage REITs were not delivering to investors they would not be in a position to raise capital. Last I checked, the United States was still a capitalist country despite efforts to the contrary.” This quote from the CEO of mortgage REIT Annaly is not encouraging [Bloomberg] $$$ "But the debate between Krugman and Paul on Bloomberg TV this afternoon was more awkward than awesome, like a special episode of the Sopranos with the character of Tobias Funke." [DI] $$$ This novel by a former Lehman MD begins "The weight of the cufflinks was palpable." [Fiction Studio]

Write-Offs: 10.27.15

SABMiller needs more time; SEC gets tough with JP Morgan; "Canadian restaurant stuffs burger with Reese's Peanut Butter Cups"; and more.

Write-Offs: 03.23.12

$$$ Morgan Stanley wants all of Citi venture [Reuters] $$$ NYSE CEO Duncan Niederauer is not above gloating about BATS [CNBC via BI] $$$ Fannie and Freddie: Slashing Mortgages Is Good Business [ProPublica] $$$ Proposed names for Disney's Seven Dwarfs included Burpy, Hotsy, Shifty, Wistful, Doleful, Woeful, and Biggo-Ego [Lists of Note] $$$ JPMorgan is looking for a credit risk manager to cover banks and broker-dealers [DBCC] $$$ SEC demands Wells Fargo comply with subpoenas [Reuters] $$$ Lehman Ex-Broker Sentenced in Insider Case [WSJ] $$$ Ex-NBA Player Indicted on Ponzi Charges [WSJ] $$$ About forty people got out of their cars along Interstate 270 in Maryland and helped themselves to $5,795 in cash that fell out of an unsecured armored truck. ... Police are offering amnesty to anyone who returns the cash, but only $100 has been handed over so far. Heather Kelly described the scene on 270 to the AP: “It was in the traffic lanes and on the shoulders and just generally kind of like a snow globe of cash." [DI] $$$ Lacrosse players say the sport rewards the kind of determination required to do well on Wall Street. “By and large, lacrosse players aren’t necessarily the best athletes in the country,” says Joe Lizzio, a former Cornell player and co-founder of CapRok Capital. “We don’t have huge vertical leaps or run the 40 [meter dash] in 4.4 seconds.” The best lacrosse players “are smart kids that put in the long hours,” adds Cummings. “The same goes for finance, where you’re going to do well if you can outwork the other guy.” Another common attribute of lacrosse players is the kind of privileged upbringing that might have led them to banking careers even if they had never touched a stick. [BW]

Write-Offs: 08.31.12

$$$ "Bernanke Signals Readiness to Do More" [WSJ] $$$ "Judgment Days Arrive for Euro Crisis" [WSJ] $$$ Spain To Recapitalize Bankia After 4.45 Billion-Euro Loss [Bloomberg] $$$ Nomura’s Failed Global Ambitions [DealBook] $$$ Quebec Whodunit: 1/4 of Province’s Syrup Reserves Go Missing [WSJ] $$$ That’s it for us today. We’re off Monday for the holiday, enjoy the long weekend and see you on Tuesday! $$$ A global investment bank is looking for an experienced metals options trader in New York [DBCC] $$$ Facebook hits new low after price target cuts [Reuters] $$$ Here is some hedge fund Weltschmerz [FT] $$$ Here is a really depressing story about student loans [NYT] $$$ Some people still don't like PowerPoint [BBW] $$$ "In general, rabbits preferred the higher resolution of the MacBook, whereas squirrels favored the larger screen of the Toshiba. Chipmunks were too hyperactive to linger around either device, even though I sprinkled the keyboards liberally with birdseed, which chipmunks seem to enjoy far more than birds do. I do not recommend this practice ..." [NYT]