As longtime Dealbreaker readers know, hedge fund manager Phil Falcone has a pet pig who can play the piano. Falcone's wife, Lisa Maria, mentioned this to W magazine back in 2010, and for the past number of years, we've written about Wilbur Falcone as though she was much more than just a pet.
We made her not just a member of the Falcone family but one of Phil's closest advisors who lost her shit when the Harbinger founder made a number of of mistakes that began with borrowing money from a gated fund to pay personal taxes and ended with him being banned from the securities industry for five years. (She was similarly livid over Lightsquared, a cockamamie idea if she'd ever heard one.)
We gave her a backstory that involved working at gentlemen's club called Bottom’s Up down by the Seaport, where she met Phil and Lisa on Valentine's Day, 2007. Boris, the owner who was a pig in every sense of the word, had finally consented to letting her play the piano that sat unused next to Stage 3 and as she hit the crescendo of “Luck Be A Lady", there they were: the prince and his princess, ravishing in a pair of gold sandals and a makeshift gladiator outfit fashioned from cut up Hefty bags.
We said things moved fast and after weeks of pleading on the Falcones' part--"What’s there to think about," Phil pressed one night. "You already feel like family to us."-- Wilbur agreed to move in with them.
We said that she quickly got used to the lifestyle Phil's salary afforded her-- silk muumuus, a tab at Bergdorf's, a man servant-- and when his seemingly endless series of bad business decisions threatened that lifestyle, she did not take it well.
We said at the low point of their relationship, she called animal control on him.
We said after everything, he came up with a plan to win back her trust.
Meanwhile, up in Connecticut, this was actually happening:
Multiple sources tell us that SAC Capital and Point72 Asset Management founder Cohen, worth $11.4 billion, has been keeping an obese oinker named Romeo at his sprawling Connecticut estate, where the spoiled swine lived in the house and even had his own room. But — as wild as this sounds — Romeo got a little too porky for Cohen’s 35,000-square-foot, 30-room mansion. Weighing in at over 150 pounds, the pampered pig has just been posted to a vegan animal rescue facility in Florida. One source who saw the mogul with his hallowed hog before it was exiled said, “Their pet pig was like a member of the Cohen family. Romeo had a room in their house. He was treated like the king of the house, but he got too big, and was sent to a sanctuary in Florida. They even threw a leaving dinner for him.” It is not clear if Romeo traveled by private jet to his Florida farm...Romeo started out as a pet for Cohen’s seven kids, but grew to become a member of the family. The source added, “Most people get one of those Vietnamese teacup pigs, but Romeo is the size of a German Shepherd who has eaten too much.”
Will Wilbur and Romeo's paths cross this summer, in the Hamptons or points unknown? Will they hate each other at first, until they realize their lives aren't so different? Stay tuned.