Pershing Square down 26.4% YTD; JPM and Citi shareholders will vote on breaking up banks; Florida woman fights to keep potty-trained pet alligator; and more.

Forex Tumult good for banks; "How 300 Emails Led to a Summer Job on Wall Street"; Snow Kone Joe vs. Mr. Ding-A-Ling Ice Cream Truck; and more.

$$$ JPMorgan Said To Face Escalating Senate Probe Of CIO Loss [Bloomberg] $$$ J.P. Morgan Names New Chief Investment Officer [Deal Journal] $$$ Banks now like to do quarterly calls with bondholders [WSJ] $$$ Some people still like big banks [Bloomberg] $$$ FINRA is suing a test-prep firm for taking Series 7, etc., exams 64 times, failing 52 of those times, and memorizing the questions to tell their students [Reuters; the complaint is also amusing] $$$ [Harvard] Economics concentrator Ali E. Evans ’13 received his [Harvard Business School] acceptance email on Wednesday while sitting in class next to his roommates. He said he celebrated silently and texted his parents. Evans said he has visited classes at the Business School with his tutors at Kirkland House since sophomore year. "Leading my own company one day is definitely a goal of mine, and so business school definitely fits in with that plan," he said. [Crimson] $$$ Pimco is looking for a diversity & inclusion coordinator in Newport Beach [DBCC] $$$ Qatar Imperils Big Merger of Commodity Companies [DealBook] $$$ There's a new Kindle Fire and it's cheaper [WSJ] $$$ Citigroup, Goldman, UBS Sued Over Mortgage-Backed Bonds [Bloomberg] $$$ Goldman must face mortgage debt claims - 2nd Circuit [Reuters] $$$ European political leader says "Some fans of group sex say that it’s better than one-on-one because, as with any collective work, you can skive off," is not Silvio Berlusconi [Telegraph]

Ex-NY Giant accused of running Ponzi scheme; Wall Street wary of Rand Paul; Starting a business is hard; "Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson Eats About 821 Pounds Of Cod Per Year"; and more.

Moody's fate in subprime probe to be decided soon; "Luxury pool toys are booming"; Lockhart worried about rising rates; Australian man produces record-breaking 110.6-decibel burp; and more.

Ex-Goldman banker acquitted in rape case; Ex-UBS banker working with drones; Ex-Fed Chairman will limit himself to 2 hedge fund consulting gigs (plus blogging job); "Trooper In Trouble For Snoop Dogg Photo Sues Bosses"; and more.

$$$ Here are Dick Fuld's call logs from March through September of 2008. Tim Geithner, Hank Paulson, Lloyd Blankfein, Jamie Dimon, Ken Lewis, Rodge Cohen, Raj Rajaratnam ... [Jenner] $$$ The quants and derivatives traders of Occupy Wall Street [WaPo] $$$ Spain in talks over ‘bad bank’ scheme [FT] $$$ [@JeffMacke] $$$ Duke University grad doesn't want to waste her unique talents working on Wall Street, works in management consulting instead [DealBook, earlier] $$$ A leading M&A boutique is looking for a class of 2011 or 2010 FIG associate [DBCC] $$$ Large layoffs loom on Wall Street [Fortune] $$$ SEC Charges Mother, Daughter, and Their Attorney in Illegal Penny Stock Scheme [SEC] $$$ Barnes & Noble’s Nook Unit Is Worth More Than Its Parent Company [DealBook] $$$ “If mortgage REITs were not delivering to investors they would not be in a position to raise capital. Last I checked, the United States was still a capitalist country despite efforts to the contrary.” This quote from the CEO of mortgage REIT Annaly is not encouraging [Bloomberg] $$$ "But the debate between Krugman and Paul on Bloomberg TV this afternoon was more awkward than awesome, like a special episode of the Sopranos with the character of Tobias Funke." [DI] $$$ This novel by a former Lehman MD begins "The weight of the cufflinks was palpable." [Fiction Studio]