10 Year-Old Summering In The Hamptons With Full-Time Nanny, Filet Mignon Dinners, Private Jet Rides Doesn't Think Doubling His Allowance Is Too Much To Ask

Attention mom and dad of this anonymous pre-teen: apparently it's time to loosen the purse strings, ya cheap pricks.

What’s your allowance? It’s $350 a month, but if I run out, I’ve memorized my mom’s credit card number so I’m covered. What do you spend it on? Lunch, Starbucks, gadgets. I also do Postmates three times a week in the city. My mom never knows it’s coming until it arrives. In the Hamptons, I like Surf Shop, but I don’t know how to surf. What do you think your allowance should be? About $700 a month seems fair. You have a credit card. What kind? I have a Gold AmEx. Sometimes at stores they question me, like when I was buying chocolate recently, and they looked to my nanny to see if she was going to pay, but I gave them my credit card and they said, “Aren’t you a little young for this?” Do you pay your credit card bill yourself? My mom does. I don’t even look at it. I am too young for that. [FWD]


Financial Services Employee's Excel Spreadsheet Of Dating Prospects Allows For 18 Year-Olds, Has No Room For "Jappy" Girls

Have you ever wanted to bring the same methodical organization and analytical rigor to your dating life that you bring to your work product? Did you think to yourself, "Excel, of course," and proceed to create a spreadsheet that included not simply the names, phone numbers, and photos of the people you were either in the early stages of or attempting to date but the last time you "communicated," the last time (if ever) you saw each other, and your initial thoughts on said person? A document that did not allow you to input a number in the "age" column but choose one from a drop-down list (18-30), just as it constrained you from entering a value of less than 7.0 in the "appearance" field, lest you attempt to veer off course with someone underage, old, or not up to an acceptable level of hotness? Did you tell a person included in said document about its existence and did you proceed to send it to her? At least one financial services professional feels you. From: [redacted] Date: Sat, Apr 7, 2012 at 12:16 AM Subject: spreadsheet... Well...this could be a mistake, but what the hell. I thought about deleting the names, but figured I might as will give you the whole thing. I only deleted the non-match people's names (at the bottom) since some I've known for a long time. I hope this e-mail doesn't backfire, because I really had a great time and hope to hang again soon :). However, I will keep my word! Have a great weekend! Prospects Spreadsheet [PDF]