With All Due Respect, Descendant Of Alexander Hamilton Pretty Sure Treasury Department Is Out Of Its Friggin Mind

Doug Hamilton would like a word with Jack Lew.

Author:
Bess Levin
Updated:
Jan 14, 2019
Original:
Jul 10, 2015

Doug Hamilton has no problem with the Treasury's decision to put a woman on a U.S. bill. Let's just get that out of the way right up front. But Jacob Joseph Lew, let it be on the $1, $5, $20, $50, or $100 bill! Those guys already get enough action, and, little known fact, Hamilton loved paper money. For god's sake, why not just replace him on the ten with Aaron Burr, you sacrilegious f*cks.

The 64-year-old salesman for IBM has joined a growing backlash against what he calls the “diminishing” of Hamilton, who as the country’s first treasury secretary created the modern US financial system, with a national debt, bank and mint, and with the dollar as currency...He’s urging people to sign a petition on the White House “We The People” website, and this weekend he’ll be preaching the Hamiltonian gospel at a series of annual events in New York and New Jersey planned around the anniversary of Alexander Hamilton’s death on July 12, 1804, a day after his duel with Aaron Burr. The trip also will include a preview of the hip-hop musical “Hamilton,” based on Ron Chernow’s biography of Alexander Hamilton, opening on Broadway.

$10 bill change rankles descendant of Alexander Hamilton [AP]

Jack Lew is not throwing away his shot.

As you have likely heard, President Obama plans to put Tim Geithner out of his misery tomorrow by nominating Jack Lew for Treasury Secretary. Lew is known for being Obama's White House Chief of Staff and also for having an absurd signature. And not like chicken scratch illegible-absurd, like not resembling anything in the alphabet, might as well have drawn an illustration of two alpacas fornicating/signed his name Mariah Carey absurd. And, should he be confirmed and subsequently have his name printed on a bunch of dollar bills, Lew will likely be forced to come up with something that actually looks like it spells "Jacob Lew" as opposed to what is he is currently signing receipts and important documents with, i.e. this:

Allan Ash, pictured at left, is 95 years-old. He's lived through the Great Depression. Hitler's rise to power. Pearl Harbor. Korea. The assassination of John F. Kennedy. He's got heart problems. Water on his lungs. No use of his legs. He lost his sight several years back. But you wanna know the biggest disappointment of his life? The fact that his grandson turned out to be a two-faced rotten bum who should count his lucky stars grandpa is only going after his ass in court and not on the streets. In papers filed in Manhattan Supreme Court, Allan Ash, 95, said he had just one condition when he gave the money to Geoffrey Richards earlier this year — that if he recovered from heart problems and needed any of the money back, his grandson would give it to him. Ash did get better and asked for $200,000 back in early April — but Richards refused to pay him a dime, court papers say. Now the grandfather who says he treated Richards like a son is suing to get back every penny. “He is a scoundrel. He loves money,” the fuming retired CPA said at his East Side home yesterday. “He is the greatest disappointment in my life.” [Ash paid] for a fancy boarding school for Richards, as well as college and law school, court papers read. He also paid for Richards to take vacations in places like Israel, Amsterdam, Greece, Italy and Sweden, the suit continues. After Richards’ graduation, Ash “continued to try and make life easier” for his grandson, giving him $600,000 over the past 14 years, according to the lawsuit. The money helped make Richards a success — he’s a managing director at a global investment firm in Chicago, making over $1 million a year, court papers say. He’s also the grandson Ash had wanted to handle his affairs when he died, so when heart problems and water on the lungs had him thinking the end was near this past spring, he loaned Richards the $950,000 — some of which he hoped would be used to arrange his own funeral services...When Ash got better, he asked for $200,000 of the money back, and Richards — who lives in a multimillion-dollar home by himself — refused, the suit says. “Lightning struck my heart,” Ash recalled. “I was enraged, betrayed.” He said he now plans to have another grandson who lives in New York handle his affairs, and wants the money back for that grandchild and another relative. ‘Heart woe’ CPA says kin reneged on $950K loan [NYP] Spoiled Grandson Won't Return My $950K, Angry 95-Year-Old Grandpa Says [DNAI] 40 Under 40: Geoffrey Richards [Crain's]

They're in a co-dependent relationship.

Just hear her out.

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