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Write-Offs: 4.17.15

Greece "scrapes the bottom of the barrel"; UBS will exit U.S. automated options market-making business; A tour of mansions owned by white collar criminals; "Truck Of Bees Overturns On Washington State Highway"; and more.

Write-Offs: 01.31.13

$$$ Gorman Gets a Big Bump in Base Salary [DealBook] $$$ Wasendorf Gets 50 Years [WSJ] $$$ Suit reveals new details of Paulson's role in Goldman Abacus CDO [Reuters] $$$ Tony James thinks private equity should maybe be renamed "clarity equity" [DealBook] $$$ Tony James also thinks that "the hot credit markets are more of a negative" for private equity [Fortune] $$$ No, Obama Will Not Tear Down Reagan’s Childhood Home Brick by Brick [DI] $$$ World Class PhD Modellers - New Jersey - Hedge Fund - say no more [DBCC] $$$ U.S. Sues to Halt Takeover of Modelo [WSJ] $$$ Monte Paschi Rating Cut as Probe Digs Deeper Into Losses [Bloomberg] $$$ "Very few people live their lives with wealth-maximization as their exclusive goal, and if Zuckerberg doesn't want to maximize Facebook's financial value nobody can make him." [Slate / Matt Yglesias] $$$ The perpetualisation of debt [FTAV] $$$ No-Fun Mississippi House Bill Seeks to Outlaw Animal-Human Hybrids [BetaBeat]

Write-Offs: 7.2.15

Greece; Puerto Rico; Currency market rigging; Yelp sale; "Leopard mauls guide’s arm during safari tour"; and more.

Write-Offs: 12.15.15

Fed set to rock your world tomorrow; Apollo may lose $3 billion over typo; Vatican doing something about money-laundering; "Giant Penis Christmas Lights Arouse Scorn"; and more.

Write-Offs: 06.11.12

$$$ Euro zone discussed capital controls if Greek exits euro [Reuters] $$$ Spain's Bailout Boost Quickly Turns to Rout [WSJ] $$$ Fed Says U.S. Wealth Fell 38.8% In 2007-2010 On Housing [Bloomberg] $$$ Bankers Complain of Tension With Fed Over Pay Restrictions [Real Time Economics] $$$ David Cameron left his 8-year-old daughter alone in a pub [AP] $$$ The world's oldest animal marriage looks set to have turtley ended after an incredible 115 years when the two Giant Turtles at an Austrian zoo refused to share their cage anymore. Zoo management have called in animal experts to try and give the pair counselling - feeding them romantic good mood food and trying to get them to join in joint games - but so far without effect. Zoo boss Helga Happ said: "We get the feeling they can't stand the sight of each other anymore." Bibi and Poldi have been a pair since before anyone alive today can remember - they have been together at the Austrian zoo in Klagenfurt for 36 years and before that they lived at Basel zoo in Switzerland. Zoo boss Helga added: "They are both 115 years old - they have been together since they were young and grew up together, eventually becoming a pair. But for no reason that anyone can discover they seem to have fallen out, they just can't stand each other." [Austrian Times] $$$ Intrepid Investment Bankers LLC is looking for an M&A vice president in LA [DBCC] $$$ U.S. high court to hear Amgen securities lawsuit case [Reuters] $$$ A stupid CNBC chart [Felix Salmon] $$$ A stupid Bloomberg headline [Strange Bloomberg Headlines] $$$ A yacht named the Blind Date exploded and sank in the Atlantic Ocean off Sandy Hook, New Jersey [nj.com] $$$ Jerry Sandusky's lawyer tells a jury: "You saw those 8 photos, cute kids" [Penn Live via Deadspin]

Write-Offs: 5.6.16

Credit Suisse banker case said to widen with 3 new suspects; Berkshire operating profit falls short; Chinese live-streamers banned from 'seductively eating bananas' on camera; and more.

Write-Offs: 06.08.12

$$$ Europe Considers a Spanish Bank Rescue [Bloomberg] $$$ S&P says U.S. to avoid "fiscal cliff", risks remain [Reuters] $$$ "The fact is that if UBS ended up losing anywhere close to $350 million on Facebook stock, it has no business being in the equity capital markets at all." [Felix Salmon] $$$ Groupon is Now Giving Groupons ... for Groupon [NYO] $$$ Who cheats more, bankers or politicians? Disappointingly, bankers, according to a survey conducted in bars [Wonkblog] $$$ John Carney takes the pulse of Wall Streeters "waiting for a fourth martini at a once-fashionable midtown bar," "at a tavern along a cobble-stoned street in the financial district," "[a]t Stone Rose in the Time Warner center" and "having a drink with a colleague at Emmett O’Lunney’s" [NetNet] $$$ Are you a credit risk specialist? Any interest in analyzing credit risk for the National Rural Utilities Cooperative Finance Corporation in Dulles, VA? [DBCC] $$$ Citi Won't Request Stock Buyback This Year [WSJ] $$$ Gupta ‘Highly Likely’ to Take the Stand, Lawyer Says [WSJ Law Blog] $$$ After reading a passage about the prospect of Goldman buying a bank, Mr. Naftalis asked the chief executive if he had read the portion correctly. “Yes,” replied a smiling Mr. Blankfein, who glanced from the jury to the judge. “You read it well.” Judge Jed Rakoff, prone to making jokes during trial himself, belted out a laugh, and the courtroom followed. [DealBook] $$$ This year’s Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest is expected to be even more heated than usual now that ESPN, which televises the July 4 competition, has pushed the start time later to accommodate the sports network’s first-ever coverage of Wimbledon. ... Major League Eating president George Shea said he expects the later 3 p.m. start time to also drive up ratings for the glutton-fest, which attracted 1.9 million live viewers last year. But he admits the mid-afternoon heat “should make it much more difficult” for the dog devourers to break Joey Chestnut’s 2009 world record of 68 hot dogs and buns in 10 minutes. “Heat causes the buns to crisp up more and the dogs to expand, making a run at the record nearly impossible,” said professional eater and perennial Nathan’s contestant Jason “Crazy Legs” Conti. [NYP] $$$ Vampire High Priest Loses Religious Civil Rights Case [ATL]