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Republicans Forget To Cravenly Bash Wall Street In First Debate

There was a lot of talk about Siamese Twins and pimps, but Wall Street got the night off.

Last night's first debate in the 2016 Republican Clown Car Drive to the White House was a doozy.

Topics ranged from ISIS to Planned Parenthood, from Siamese twins to God, and from Donald Trump to Donald Trump. But one well-worn political haymaker was left almost entirely alone; Wall Street.

A healthy percentage of the legion of GOP candidates have gone out of their way to criticize the financial sector so far this campaign cycle, but when it came to debate night none but one actually made the effort to say anything at all about Wall Street.

In fact, during both the varsity and JV debates, none of the major anti-bank candidates (your Rand Pauls, your Rick Perrys, your Ted Cruzs) had anything to say about those titans of industry that are playing fast and loose with all their power and influence over the good folks on Main Street.

Rand kept to picking fights with Trump. Cruz chose to spend the few moments he was aloud to speak blaming everything on Barack Obama, and Perry will remember yesterday as the day he got his ass handed to him by the lady that broke Hewlett-Packard.

Only one candidate had the balls to say something about Wall Street yesterday. Unfortunately the candidate was Mike Huckabee and what he said was pretty useless.

Huckabee outlined what he saw as a systematic problem with modern American politics. "The problem is that we have a Wall Street-to-Washington axis of power that is controlling the political climate," he said. "The donor class feeds the political class, and then it does the dance that the donor class wants."

Lucky for Hucky, the star of the night - venal New York City-based contractor Donald Juarez Trump - helped elucidate the "donor class" point by bragging that the only reason she-devil Hillary Clinton attended his 2005 wedding was that he had donated to her in the past and she had to come.

And Hillary was also likely the key to why we heard so little bullsh!t criticism of Wall Street in the first debate. For now, the 17 candidates are running against each other and that means they want to save some arrows in the quiver for when they attack Hillary and her relationship with Wall Street.

The only flaw in that plan is that if they are still hanging around to fight Hillary in the General Election, they will almost certainly have taken some money from a bank or three.

But hey, hypocrisy goes down easier when it helps buy ad time in Florida.


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