Greece might be saved; Les Moonves stiffs valet because he only carries hundreds; Fisher wants tougher bank penalties; "Montana hosting annual Testicle Festival in Virginia Square this year"; and more.

$$$ J.P. Morgan Suspends Share Buyback [WSJ] $$$ Bank of America's CEO 'Comfortable' With Investments [CNBC] $$$ Gupta ‘Threw Away His Duties,’ Prosecutor Says In Opening [Bloomberg] $$$ France, Germany Fail to Resolve Differences Over Euro Bonds [WSJ] $$$ U.S. lets China bypass Wall Street for Treasury orders [Reuters] $$$ MF Global's Corzine Got More Than $8 Million in Year Before Collapse [WSJ] $$$ S&P is looking for an associate to rate media and entertainment companies in Chicago - interested? [DBCC] $$$ "On average, for every additional 1% a company returned to shareholders between 2009 and 2011, the CEO was paid 0.6% more last year, the analysis found. For every 1% decline in shareholder return, the CEO was paid 0.6% less. ... In 2010, there was no correlation; for every 1% decrease in shareholder return, the average CEO was paid 0.02% more." [WSJ]$$$ Enron Ex-CEO Seeks Retrial On ‘New Evidence,’ Lawyer Says [Bloomberg] $$$ SEC move set to boost covered bonds in US [FT] $$$ With New Firepower, S.E.C. Tracks Bigger Game [DealBook] $$$ The New York Times printed a giant Gretchen Morgenson story about insider trading except there was no insider trading [Reuters / Felix Salmon, also Reformed Broker] $$$ Taxi Panel May Raise Fares Up to 20% [NYT] $$$ Gal claims she was 'too hot' to work in lingerie shop, forced to wear robe before getting boot: suit [NYP]

Hedge fund manager pull out all the stops; Ex-Delta exec fined in insider trading scam; Fleeing suspect deploys smokescreen, spikes in police chase; and more.

Greece's new proposal; The cost of a cyberattack blackout; "Dispute over reclined seat on flight turned violent"; and more.

Ex-GS programmer found guilty again; Churchill Downs makes $83 million in two minutes; Sony CEO doesn't have very nice things to say about Bill Ackman; "World Naked Gardening Day is just a day away"; and more.

Greece says it will default in June if people don't get their asses in gear; Can you sue your boss for sending late night work emails?; "For $300, You Can Drink Gin Made From The Bodies Of Foraged Ants"; Leon Black loves Carl Icahn; Feces ruin PA Sweet 16; and more.

$$$ LIBOR Pains: How Much Will the LIBOR Scandal Cost US Banks? $35 Billion [MarketPlace/Heidi Moore] $$$ Matthew Goldstein: JPMorgan disclosed possible misconduct to feds ahead of earnings [Reuters] $$$ PFG Founder Has No Money For Attorney [CNBC] $$$ Bernanke Offers Bleak View in Testimony [WSJ] $$$ Plane Flying Above Penn State Warns: “Take Down The Statue Or We Will” [Deadspin] $$$ Gupta Seeks Help From Friends for Lenient Sentence [FBN/Charlie Gasparino] $$$ HSBC Executive Resigns at Senate Money Laundering Hearing [Bloomberg] $$$ Teens Having Sex Behind Ikea, Locals Say [DNAI]

$$$ Eurozone deal over bank bailout in doubt [FT] $$$ U.K. Bankers Group to Stop Overseeing Libor [WSJ] $$$ The Smith Barney Name Still Lives (Sort of) [Deal Journal] $$$ Mason Capital may lose money on its delightful Telus trade [DealBook] $$$ Actually, business and political leaders aren't that stressed [LAT] $$$ “I’ve had to sit here all night staring at a whale,” [Jes] Staley said last night, a few hours into a gala for the NYU Langone Medical Center’s Hospital for Joint Diseases and Center for Musculoskeletal Care. He was accepting an award for corporate leadership. Staley then suggested the whale could be replaced with the squid in the room, which, he clarified afterward, meant Goldman Sachs Group Inc., represented by his friend Gary D. Cohn, chairman of the dinner and the hospital’s advisory board. Rolling Stone writer Matt Taibbi called Goldman a “vampire squid.” All this took place about 20 feet from a diorama depicting a battle between a sperm whale and a giant squid. Which creature will triumph is unclear, though squid have been found in whales’ stomachs. [Bloomberg] $$$ Macquarie's Credit Solutions Group, a distressed and special situations financing group, is looking for a 2nd or 3rd-year analyst in New York [DBCC] $$$ Or just be an event coordinator for Breaking Media [Fashionista] $$$ Uber Bear Sees S&P at 800...Just Not Yet [CNBC!] $$$ Eighth Grader Says He Vandalized Congressman’s Office [NYT] $$$ Mitt Romney Stops Supporters from Chanting ‘Ryan’ to Ensure They Say His Name Too [Gawker] $$$ Police launched investigation into the 'suspicious' moon [Telegraph]