By The Time Pope Francis Leaves New York, He's Going To Be Picking Out Letterhead For Pontiff Capital Management: Wall Street

He's not just going to come around on capitalism, he's gonna want in.
Author:
Updated:
Original:

If you're on Pope Francis's distribution list, you know that he is not exactly the biggest fan of Wall Street. In his June encyclical, he railed against too big to fail and said he wants "restraints...imposed on those possessing greater resources and financial power." In July, he noted that "the unfettered pursuit of money...is the dung of the devil." And he's used the phrase "savage capitalism" on a bunch of occasions. Still, a number of finance executives feel confident that they can not only find some middle ground with ole Franny during his visit to NYC later this month, but that they can make a convert of the guy.

“He’s made it very clear that he has a particular affinity for the downtrodden and the less fortunate,” said Ken Langone, a billionaire investor who co-founded Home Depot Inc. and gave $200 million to New York University’s medical school. “New York, to me, is the city on the hill that demonstrates philanthropy and giving back and caring for others more than any other city. And I think he’ll see that.” [...] “When you look at some of the great business leaders on Wall Street, they demonstrate a lot of the same attributes the pope demonstrates,” said John Studzinski, a vice chairman at private-equity firm Blackstone Group LP who’s on the board of the St. Patrick’s Cathedral Landmark Foundation. “Very clear, strong convictions; strong views on leadership; can’t really be micromanaged; are very stubborn and tenacious, but at the same time are very good listeners and tend to surround themselves with good people.”

If Francis doesn't drive off in his popemobile telling his assistant to get his deals guy on the horn to draw up the papers for Pontiff Capital Management, Langone et al will eat their god damn words. He's going to be a regular at Bull & Bear by the end of next month.

Can Wall Street Sell the Pope on Capitalism? [Bloomberg]

Related

News

Pope Francis, Rogue Trader Have A Chat

News

Pope To Wall Street: Enjoy Satan's Sh#t

In stercore confidimus diaboli.

News

Bloomberg: Would It Kill This Pope To Act Like A God Damn Rich Person Every Now And Then?

It's like those $8 billion to his name are just going to waste.

News

Titans Of Industry Wondering If Pope Could Just Let Them Not Change And Not Go To Hell

It's not like Vatican Bank is run by actual angels, y'know.

News

Ken Langone Hates The New York Times

News

How Can Wall Street Feel Alive Again?

As some of you may recall, there was a time not too long ago when you could work on Wall Street and be compensated in a way that made you feel special. Appreciated. Loved. Eight, nine, ten-figures of love. Now, obviously, not so much. But that is not what's eating the industry's most fragile spirits of late. They are fine taking pay cuts. They could care less about the money. What they're not fine with is having the rush, the intensity, the adrenaline-pumping fear that comes with, say, putting on a trade in which maybe the firm will make $1 billion or maybe it'll lose $10 billion, WHO KNOWS, IT'S ALL RELATIVE, I CAN'T FEEL MY LEGS, THAT'S WHAT MAKES IT SO EXCITING taken away from them. Take Sean George. He used to spend his days destroying company property and now, thanks to financial regulation, has had to get his kicks elsewhere. Sean George kneeled in the Church of St. Paul the Apostle in Manhattan. He wasn’t praying. A gash below his right brow bled into his eye and down his nose before a knee to his groin sent him to the floor. George, 39, head of credit-derivatives trading at Jefferies, was making his Muay Thai debut at the church June 22 in a sport that allows kicking, elbowing and kneeing. His eye was swelling shut by the time he lost in a split decision. It was the happiest he’s been all year, he said. “Right now at work I’m making less risk decisions -- and I enjoy taking risks,” George, who headed investment-grade credit-default-swap trading at Deutsche Bank AG before he joined Jefferies last year, said in an interview. “If you’re in it for the game and the fight, the game’s over and the fight’s over.” Risk is what drew George and the colleagues he respects to Wall Street, he said. He could bring in millions of dollars in a single month at his peak, and trading was so intense that during one credit-default-swap deal he smashed a phone against his desk, sending part of it three rows away, “one of the records for the best break,” he said. Ethan Garber's lost that tingly feeling in his plums. “There’s no sexiness, there’s no fun, there’s no intellectual intrigue, either,” said Ethan Garber, who ran proprietary credit-arbitrage portfolios for Credit Suisse Group AG and Bear Stearns Cos. “A lot of my friends who actually lingered for the last four years are all now getting fired anyway,” said Garber, 45, currently CEO of IdleAir, a Knoxville, Tennessee-based firm that provides electricity at truck stops. “The air is taken out.” Robert McTamaney has been reduced to doing his best impression of a whiskey-swilling, cigar-chomping newspaper man from the 1940's, who we assume addressed Bloomberg's Max Abelson as "toots" here. “The socks are higher, the skirts are longer,” said McTamaney, who helped run Goldman Sachs’s equities- trading business in Asia. “It’s like styles: They change, and you’ve got to change with it or be left behind.” Former King Street Capital and Bank of America trader Sam Polk isn't gonna lie, the worst part of Wall Street 2.0 is not being able to feel like a god by dropping $10,000 for bottle service on Wednesday nights, and sometimes even Thursdays. “You could be a 20-something trader three years out of school, able to go to any restaurant or club or ballgame on any night that you wanted, and it was totally paid for,” he said. “It was a tremendous feeling of power.” Michael Meyer is dying a slow, painful death. “The light at the end of the tunnel is dim,” said Meyer, now co-head of sales and trading at New York investment bank Seaport Group. Clearly, it's not pretty. But here at Dealbreaker we're about offering solutions, not whining about problems. How can these guys and girls replicate the feelings they once got by taking on risk on the job, if, unlike Sean George, getting kicked in the balls is not their thing? Drinking the carton of milk in the break room that's been sitting out for two days, telling the boss's wife it looks like she's gained a couple pounds, having unprotected sex with a junkie, shouting "You go girl!" at yourself in spin class after being kindly told to "Shut the fuck up" or else, and leaving dirty dishes in the sink all seem like good jumping off points but we can do better. These people need our help. Bloodied Trader Pines For Risk As Wall Street Retreats [Bloomberg]

News

Leaving Wall Street For Ivory Tower

News

Silvio Berlusconi Somehow Figures Out A Way To Combine His Love Of The Pope And Centerfolds