$$$ Draghi kills hope of instant action [FT] $$$ Mario Draghi's rescue plan for the euro: So that's what he meant [Economist] $$$ Goldman to Invest in City Jail Program, Profiting if Recidivism Falls Sharply [NYT] $$$ BofA in talks with Fannie Mae over mortgage dispute [Reuters] $$$ Missile Defense Staff Warned To Stop Surfing Porn Sites [Bloomberg via DI] $$$ New York Yankees Facebook Page Announces Derek Jeter To Miss Rest Of Season Due To Sex Change [Deadspin] $$$ Want to decide how much people at BlackRock get paid? They're looking for a Senior Compensation/Total Rewards Analyst in New York [DBCC] $$$ Facebook: The Stock That Keeps on Dropping [BBW] $$$ Europe Keeps Weighing on GM's Results [WSJ] $$$ Pimco’s El-Erian Says World in Serious Slowdown [Bloomberg] $$$ Romney's Horse Ranks 13th In Olympic Debut [WSJ] $$$ "Some account holders want to withdraw their money. I ask them why and give it to them if other children approve. Everyone earns five per cent interest on their savings." [Kottke]

$$$ Icahn Reports Big Stake in Herbalife; Shares Jump [WSJ] $$$ Thursday M&A Craze Shakes Up League Tables [WSJ] $$$ Big hedge funds fueled fourth-quarter dive in Apple shares [Reuters] $$$ RIM’s old CEO is so impressed with BB10 that he dumped all of his 26.8M shares in the company [VB] $$$ 'Frustrated' Madoff Now Second Guessing His Guilty Plea [CNBC] $$$ Surprise! Royal Bank of Scotland is Hiring [EFC] $$$ At Senate Hearing, Warren Comes Out Swinging [DealBook] $$$ Citadel climbs to top as big winner at 2012 Absolute Return Awards [HFI] $$$ JPMorgan’s Gulati to launch own fund [FT] $$$ Flushing Your Anti-Anxiety Pills Down the Toilet Could Affect the Behavior of Wild Fish [Smithsonian]

Dov Charney hires investment bank in comeback bid; Draghi says ECB not finished here; Yahoo sale; Florida 'DUI expert' charged with DUI; and more.

$$$ Overheating in Credit Markets: Origins, Measurement, and Policy Responses [Fed, also Free Exchange] $$$ Justice Department, states weigh action against Moody's [Reuters] $$$ Apple Jumps After Saying in Discussions to Return Cash [Bloomberg] $$$ Christie Conditionally Backs New Jersey Internet Gambling [WSJ] $$$ "Italian Prime Minister Mario Monti was presented with a small white dog he dubbed Empatia during an appearance on a TV program. ... Bignardi then asked Monti if he would also like to adopt a dog and brought out the small mixed-breed canine. Monti said holding the fluffy dog felt 'magnificently good.'" [UPI] $$$ Cohen & Steers is looking for a US REITs research associate in New York [DBCC] $$$ "Last October, certain Dell employees were forced to sell some of their company stock at just $9.55 per share. Now the company is being sold to founder Michael Dell for $13.65 per share." [Fortune] $$$ K.K.R.’s Profit Jumps 22% on Investment Gains [DealBook] $$$ Ackman to Herbalife: You’re Not the Girl Scouts [DealBook] $$$ Generic Brand Cat Can't Hide His Disappointment [Copyranter]

Icahn, Apple, Greece, The Woman Rocking The Hedge Fund World, "Burglar Gets Stuck In Air Vent Trying To Escape"; AND MORE.

$$$ Ireland calls vote on European fiscal pact [FT] $$$ Ray Dalio’s Pure Alpha hedge fund made $13.8 billion for its investors last year, while John Paulson lost clients almost $10 billion after an unsuccessful wager that the U.S. economy would recover, according to a report by LCH Investments NV [Bloomberg] $$$ Apple joins the $500bn club [FT] $$$ Hot Item: Pre-IPO Facebook Shares [WSJ] $$$ Too many high frequency traders use the same part of the second [Grumpy Economist] $$$ No one will sell Becky Quick a minivan [Fortune] $$$ A global asset manager is looking for a portfolio manager; compensation is "astronomical" [DBCC]

$$$ Fed Seen Starting QE3 While Extending Rate Pledge to 2015 [Bloomberg] $$$ There's a new iPhone [NYT] $$$ EADS and BAE in tie-up talks [FT] $$$ Investors Ready for Wave of European Corporate Bonds [WSJ] $$$ Valiant Capital founder Chris Hansen is offering to buy a beer for everyone in Seattle [AR] $$$ JFK airport workers were arrested for stealing "tens of thousands of mini-bottles of liquor and duty-free merchandise from JFK International Airport" after an investigation called "Operation Last Call" [Fox] $$$ BlackRock's Beta Strategies team is looking for a portfolio manager [DBCC] $$$ J.P. Morgan Reorganizes Investment Banking [WSJ] $$$ Barclays Picks New Head of U.S. Rates Trading [WSJ] $$$ From Credit Suisse to Jerky: One Man's Dried Beef Odyssey [BW] $$$ Everyone involved in the Harvard cheating scandal is suing everybody else [IvyGate] $$$ "Police in Florida said a man using a credit card to buy beer was arrested after the bartender recognized the credit card as his own." [UPI]

$$$ Cyprus Rejects Deposit Levy in Blow to European Bailout Plan [Bloomberg] $$$ Cyprus’s bad haircut day [Felix Salmon] $$$ Matt Yglesias's proposals for Cyprus include selling Northern Cyprus to Turkey and Ben Bernanke giving it a €5.8bn present [Slate] $$$ Florida Financier Charged in Facebook IPO Fraud [WSJ] $$$ Credit Suisse sacks around 12 from NY rates team [Reuters] $$$ Goldman Sachs’s Scialla Twins Leave for Home-Design Firm [Bloomberg] $$$ RBC is looking for a research associate to cover medical devices healthcare companies in New York [DBCC] $$$ Activist Fights Draw More Attention [WSJ] $$$ Ackman’s J.C. Penney Losses Signal Buyout Need [Bloomberg] $$$ NFL Teams With Private-Equity Firm to Seek Media, Tech Investments [WSJ] $$$ U.S. Probes Microsoft, Partners Over Bribery Claims [WSJ] $$$ Bigamist attorney, who secretly wed a stripper and got caught, suspended six months [NYDN]