Write-Offs: 2.17.16

Ex-Deutsche Bank analyst fined, suspended over stock rating; Dairy downturn hurts banks; Man wakes up with huge penis tattoo on his leg; and more.
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Write-Offs: 9.25.15

Ex-BankAtlantic CEO gets bar, fine; "Alleged penis-measuring exec charged in blood diamond scam"; Uber v. Brazil; "A Harvard employee has been accused of stealing $80,000 from the university and spending it on Lego and Apple products."; and more.

Write-Offs: 1.28.16

China; Stress tests; Another broker cleared in Libor trial; "World's Greatest Athlete Plays Ping-Pong With His Penis"; and more.

Write-Offs: 2.3.16

Blankfein says he's probably cured; Bain and TPG join suitors for Yahoo unit; Bass on China; Vermont tattoo shop offers free Bernie Sanders tattoos; and more.

Write-Offs: 4.6.16

Citi will limit executive pay when investor returns fall; Jamie Dimon says lay off big banks; Penis Ring Sparks Bomb Alert In German Casino; and more.

Write-Offs: 4.22.15

$2.15 billion fine for Deutsche; RBC is starting an investment bank in Paris; Dalio, Bernanke and Summers walk into a bar...; "Another woman yelled out her window, ‘Shut your f--ing windows you wh*re!’” the complainant added; and more.

Write-Offs: 09.27.12

$$$ Banks’ M&A earnings drop to Lehman low [FT] $$$ Spain's crisis budget aims at spending cuts not tax rises [Reuters] $$$ There isn't really a Spanish deposit flight [FTAV] $$$ SEC Charges Investment Bank Analyst with Illegally Tipping College Friend About Nonpublic Merger Deals [SEC] $$$ Lawyer for Ex-Goldman Programmer Criticizes Prosecutors and Firm [DealBook] $$$ "Hedge Fund Pivot Joins BTG to Defy Bacon’s Investment Desert" is a real Bloomberg headline [Bloomberg] $$$ Canada cheese-smuggling ring busted [BBC] $$$ TCW is looking for a credit analyst in LA [DBCC] $$$ RIM's Earnings Beat Expectations; Shares Up 16% [WSJ] $$$ Geithner Urges an Overhaul of Rules on Money Market Funds [DealBook] $$$ SEC’s Gallagher Calls for Floating Price for Money Market Funds [Bloomberg] $$$ Mortgage rates are at all-time lows [CR] $$$ Houses on "Places" cost more than houses on "Streets" [Atlantic Cities] $$$ This happened [Twitter]

Write-Offs: 5.21.15

Guy loses $15 billion; IMF thinks things are looking up for Russian economy; Deutsche Bank heads feel serious hate; "Man Strips Naked in Protest After Being Bumped From Jamaica-Bound Flight"; and more.

Write-Offs: 09.11.12

$$$ Goldman will console itself for its lost $20mm El Paso merger fee with its $220mm profit on the other side of the deal [Dealpolitik] $$$ "What's more, they tend to finance long-term mortgage securities with short-term repo. Typically they borrow from banks for 60-90 days and just roll their loans. Banks don't have to use much capital for securitized short-term loans, so they generally extend credit lines to REITs with no trouble." That sounds great [Sober Look] $$$ Jamie Dimon said some Dimony things today [DealBook] $$$ Mark Zuckerberg wrote the founder's letter in the Facebook S-1 on his phone [SAI] $$$ Kevin Roose went to TechCrunchDisrupt conference, disrupted it [DI, also, also] $$$ Brown Brothers Harriman is looking for a banking analyst in Philadelphia [DBCC] $$$ Moody's Cautions of Possible U.S. Downgrade in 2013 [WSJ] $$$ Integrating Banks Spurs Last-Minute Fears in Europe [NYT] $$$ "A South Carolina woman said she was shocked to discover her ex-boyfriend from 12 years ago has been living in her attic." [UPI] $$$ There may be a jaguar on the prowl in East Hampton [EH Patch via DI]