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Opening Bell: 3.11.16

Hedge Fund billionaire Louis Bacon says clothing Mogul Peter Nygard plotted murder over beach house; Calls grow for Fed to hike rates in March; “All I thought about, from when the bandages first came off, was witnessing the expression on a woman’s face when she sees [it]"; and more.
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Hedge Fund Billionaire Louis Bacon Says Clothing Mogul Peter Nygard Plotted Murder Over Beach House (Forbes)
Yesterday, Moore Capital boss Louis Bacon—along with four other plaintiffs–filed a suit in Freeport, the Bahamas against Nygard and his attorney Keod Smith. The suit—which reads like a pulp crime novel—alleges that Nygard, a Canadian who lords over a low-cost clothing empire, has orchestrated a campaign of terror and physical violence against Bacon and allies Frederick Roy Smith, Joseph Darville, Romauld Ferreira and C.B. Moss. Among the claims—physical attacks, firebombing cars, home and office break-ins, vandalism, and paying people to throw anti-Bacon rallies that claimed he was a racist, a murderer, and stock crook. The most severe claim: that Nygard held talks with two men—Livingston “Bobo” Bullard and Wisler “Toggi” Davilma–about killing Bacon and co-plaintiff Frederick Smith.

Calls grow for Fed to hike rates in March (CNBC)
There's virtually no chance of that happening — literally zero, according to the CME's FedTracker tool. The Fed, at its meeting next week, instead is likely to explain in its closely followed code that it won't be hiking its rate target as it believes current financial conditions warrant a pause.

Economists mixed on ECB stimulus (CNBC)
As markets struggled to digest a fresh round of stimulus from the European Central Bank, economists also clashed in their assessments of the central bank's new policy measures. "After all the hoopla about doing more and not standing on the sidelines, the ECB seems only to have barely stepped onto the playing field," said Robert Brusca, chief economist at FAO Economics. "There is no MVP performance here." Others argued that the ECB's combined measures exceeded expectations, especially after leaving investors disappointed in December.

Canada Becomes a U.S. Creditor for First Time (Bloomberg)
Canada is now a creditor to the U.S. for the first time on record, government data show, reflecting the northern nation’s love affair with assets south of the border. The stock of U.S. assets held by Canadians in the fourth quarter of 2015 -- everything from corporate acquisitions to portfolio investments -- exceeded assets held by Americans in Canada for the first time since at least 1990, according to quarterly data published Thursday by Statistics Canada.

Two inches changed my life (NYP)
Then a year or so later — still smarting from the breakup — Jason was listlessly Googling “penile enhancement” and reading through reams of scam offers when he came across California-based urologist Dr. James Elist, who promotes such seemingly impossible dreams on his website. A jolly man of 66, Elist believed he could substantially increase Jason’s 3-inch member. “I had a single question,” Jason recalls. “ ‘When do I start?’” [...] The procedure’s then-$11,000 price tag (it has since risen to $13,000) seemed like a small sum to pay for Jason, a car salesman. “There was a little bit of swelling, but a day after the one-hour procedure, when they removed the bandages, I looked down and had an out-of-body experience,” Jason says. “I was speechless. It was as large soft as it had previously been hard. It just hung down. All I could think about was what my ex would have said.”

Commodities rally unsustainable: Goldman's Currie (CNBC)
Currie said in a "Closing Bell" interview that market views have driven a premature surge in commodity prices that is unsustainable. "I think there were three forces at play ... reflation, realignment and relevering," he said.

Wall Street's Frustrated Chinese Bankers Are Heading Back Home (Bloomberg)
As U.S. firms have cut bonuses and positions, and China’s sector explodes in sophistication and pay, some are migrating back. And while this may seem like an odd moment to repatriate, given the mounting financial jitters back home, two forces are driving the move: the fact that many feel they’re hitting a bamboo ceiling in the U.S. and the belief that Chinese growth, while slowing, is shifting into areas that will benefit bankers.

California Endowment to Yank Money From Worst-Performing Funds (Bloomberg)
The University of California’s endowment, which manages $2 billion in hedge fund investments, plans to pull money from the worst-performing managers and redirect assets to top firms, the state system’s investing chief said. The number of hedge fund managers will be cut to about 10 from 32 as soon as June, the latest move in a revamp of the university’s $95.7 billion in pension and endowment assets that began two years ago under Chief Investment Officer Jagdeep Bachher.

Elderly Brazilian fisherman and his penguin pal reunite on a beach every year after he saved the bird's life (NYDN)
Every year, a Patagonian penguin travels 5,000 miles for a heartfelt reunion with the Brazilian fisherman who saved its life. The kindhearted 71-year-old fisherman, Joao Pereira de Souza, first met the Magellanic penguin in 2011 when it washed up on a bed of rocks, starving and covered in oil. De Souza spent a week nursing the endangered bird back to health, giving him the name Dindim. The penguin wouldn’t leave the fisherman’s side when he attempted to release him back to the waters, instead living with him for 11 months. Once the penguin grew its feathers back, it disappeared, only to return a few months later. “Everyone said he wouldn’t return but he has been coming back to visit me for the past four years. He arrives in June and leaves to go home in February and every year he becomes more affectionate as he appears even happier to see me.”


By Toglenn (Own work) [CC BY-SA 3.0 or GFDL], via Wikimedia Commons

Accused Rapist Blames Hedge Fund Manager For The FBI

Peter Nygard has found another three-letter acronym he thinks Louis Bacon controls.

By Toglenn (Own work) [CC BY-SA 3.0 or GFDL], via Wikimedia Commons

Previously Delightful Neighborly Dispute Takes Inevitable Turn To The Dark And Gross

It took Louis Bacon five years, but not much imagination, to come up with the latest allegations against his Bahamian neighbor.


The Bahamas Owe Louis Bacon A Serious Apology

turns out that even alleged suborners of murder and KKK officials have rights in The Bahamas.