Twitter HQ Is Like Hogwarts But Without Magic Or Joy

"Jack Dorsey and The Prisoner of Silicon Valley"

Jack Dorsey has been back at the helm of Twitter for almost a year now, so it was hight time that his old frenemy, Vanity Fair's Nick Bilton, dropped by to check in on how the man with so many jobs is doing trying to pull his first major creation out of the gutter.


Well, it turns out that Jack is contemplative. He claims to Bilton that he doesn't check Twitter's stock price and speaks philosophically about the future:

“I want people to wake up every day and the first thing they check is Twitter in order to see what’s happening in the world,” he said between bites of his first crispy beef taco. “It’s a metaphor for checking the weather. Twitter has a similar potential.”

And downright cocky:

“If you were to describe what Twitter is,” he said, now moving on to his second beef taco, “it’s live news, entertainment, sports, and chat.”

Also hungry, apparently.

But Bilton learns that the palace unrest inside Twitter is still raging on apace, and now they're armed with analogies.

Every single product chief at Twitter—seven or eight people, depending on how you count—has been fired or forced to resign over the past decade. One former staffer told me the position is akin to the jinxed Defense Against the Dark Arts professorship in the Harry Potter saga, where every professor ends up dead or ousted at the end of the school year. A board member once said he could use only one word—“Shakespearean”—to describe the company.

Those are not fun comparisons, but Jack is not deterred. Probably because Jack remains almost unfathomably confident is his leadership abilities.

During our conversation, Dorsey tried to convince me that there was a better future for Twitter. He noted that Apple, at its low, was worth $271 million. Then Steve Jobs returned and set it on a path to a market capitalization of $774 billion. Disney, he also noted, was in the sink before Bob Iger retooled the company and led it to a valuation of more than $200 billion.

And those dudes only had one job.