Skip to main content

Reports: Marissa Mayer Thisclose To Getting Verizon To Pay $5B For What's Left Of Yahoo

She might just pull a half-dead rabbit out of a badly-damaged hat after all, you guys.

She did it, you guys. She finally did it.



Verizon Communications Inc. is nearing a deal to buy Yahoo! Inc., beating out rival bidders, people familiar with the matter said.
Verizon is discussing a price close to $5 billion for Yahoo’s core Internet business, one of the people said.

Marissa "Evita Breadsticks" Mayer has been to hell and back but, by gum, she has capitulated to raging shareholders pushed forward and is now poised to pull off a massive deal by offloading the charred remains of Yahoo for a nice round figure. But since this is Marissa Mayer selling Yahoo, what exactly is Verizon buying?

The deal doesn’t include the company’s patents at this stage, the person said. While other assets including Yahoo’s real estate were also on the block, it could not immediately be learned if they are part of the deal.

So, no patents, no Alibaba stock, no Yahoo Japan, but you do get land? This is a new kind of tech deal.

Obviously Verizon is also getting Yahoo's search, data and ad businesses, but those are balanced out by stuff like Yahoo's epically terrible deal with Mozilla. One person inside Verizon who would love to see this go down is AOL CEO Tim Armstrong, who could use Yahoo's media division to bolster his own situation and simultaneously acqui-hire his old Google colleague/rival Mayer. 

But other than Tim Armstrong's needs and revenge fantasies, there is a lot to question about why Verizon would pay $5 billion for parts of a very wounded company.

The two companies are in one-on-one discussions, one of the people said. The deal hasn’t been finalized and may still fall apart, they said.

D'uh. It's Yahoo, dude.

Verizon Nears Deal to Acquire Yahoo [Bloomberg]


Screen Shot 2016-07-06 at 10.52.09 AM

Marissa Mayer Is The Only Person Who Thinks Marissa Mayer Is Staying On At Yahoo

She could stay on post-merger, but the Gods of Logic would weep.


Marissa Mayer Is The Keyser Söze Of Business

The greatest trick Marissa ever pulled was convincing the world she didn't know what she was doing.


Marissa Mayer's Yahoo Watch Has Finally Ended...And It Was Terrible

Oh, Evita Breadsticks, we'll will miss you most of all...


Verizon Finally Gets Around To Telling Yahoo That It Ain't All That

If this relationship is gonna work out, there are going to be a quarter of a billion fewer dollars at stake.


Hey Look, It's Tim Armstrong's Turn To F@^* Up Yahoo!

Marissa Mayer finally finds herself on the right side of schadenfreude.


Verizon Ready To Admit That It Got Totally Catfished By Yahoo

This was not what Verizon fell in love with over the phone.