Withdrawals Plague Once-Mighty Hedge Funds Brevan Howard, Tudor (WSJ)
Brevan Howard’s master fund was one of the star performers during the credit crisis, but is now on pace for its third straight calendar year of losses. Investors withdrew more than $3 billion from its flagship fund in the first half of this year, according to letters sent to investors and calculations by The Wall Street Journal based on the fund’s asset levels and performance. For the year through August, two key Tudor hedge funds were down about 3%, according to investors, well below the overall market. On Tuesday, the firm reduced its workforce by about 15%, or about 60 employees, including money managers as well as other staff, according to people familiar with the matter.
Steven Cohen Settles With CFTC (WSJ)
Another U.S. regulator placed restrictions on Steven A. Cohen but did not stand in the way of the billionaire’s expected return to the hedge-fund industry in 2018. A new settlement with the Commodity Futures Trading Commission bars the former head of SAC Capital Advisors LP from any activities at a CFTC-registered firm. The CFTC is the nation’s top commodities regulator, overseeing derivatives, swaps, futures and other complicated trading instruments.
Trump’s Stock Drops With Investors in Bloomberg National Poll (Bloomberg)
Those with more than $50,000 invested are more likely to view Clinton as better for their portfolios than Trump, 46 percent to 36 percent. Investors with smaller accounts are more likely to view Trump as better for their assets, 47 percent to 31 percent.
Gaining confidence, Fed officials eye interest rate hike this year (Reuters)
The Federal Reserve is raising expectations for an interest rate rise this year, even as early as next month, after two policymakers on Tuesday said the economic stars now appear to be aligning despite weak U.S. economic growth in the first half of 2016. New York Fed President William Dudley said "it's possible" to raise rates at the Sept. 20-21 policy meeting given evidence of wage gains and a tighter labor market that could boost inflation, while Dennis Lockhart of the Atlanta Fed said a hike next month is in play.
Pokémon Go players hit with a laser attack by pig-masked couple having public sex in Sweden (NYDN)
Two teen siblings playing Pokémon Go in Sweden found something a lot crazier than a Moltres or a Mewtwo on Friday night — a couple wearing pig masks in matching shirts that blasted them with lasers. “They wore rubber masks depicting pigs’ heads and they started screaming and waving a green laser,” the sibling’s mother told Swedish newspaper Dalarnas Tidnigar. The Swedish swine lovers were wearing “King” and “Queen” shirts, squealing as they shot the laser, hitting one of the teen’s face but luckily missing the eye, which can cause blindness. As the terrified teens ran off, the two pig-headed people headed to the town’s water wheel near Highway 70 in Insjön, causing a traffic jam with their public sex session. “I was on my way home from the gym and kept on driving right into cars in front of me,” said a witness who was forced to slow down thanks to the swine sex session.
Traders Brace for More Turmoil in World’s Worst Stock Market (Bloomberg)
While most western-European markets have recovered from the Brexit shock, Italy still has a long way to go. With a looming referendum and an ongoing banking crisis, traders are paying up to hedge against more stock turbulence.
A Trading Halt, Two Years in the Making (WSJ)
U.S. securities regulators raised numerous red flags about a thinly traded company based near Tijuana, Mexico, for more than two years before suspending trading this week as the firm’s value soared to exceed $35 billion. The Securities and Exchange Commission, in eight letters sent to Neuromama Ltd. in 2014, questioned what the regulator called the company’s “vague” claims that it had developed a platform “containing all of the popular components used by a majority of the population on the Internet.” Also, Neuromama withdrew a statement that it planned to earn $3.5 million from a jazz television program after the SEC questioned why the company wasn’t sure when the show “will actually appear on the air.”
I Went Camping in the Trunk of a $145,000 Tesla (Bloomberg)
Tesla “Camper Mode,” as it’s often called, may not be sanctioned by the company, but a community of drivers is devoted to the practice. There are forums and YouTube videos that praise the virtues of Tesla camping and explore the hacks you’ll need to make it work. There’s even a third-party Tesla car app, with a “Camp Mode” function that will optimize the car’s systems for a good night’s sleep. This is a quirky, little Tesla subculture, and of course I had to try it myself.
Parakeet stolen from Canadian zoo for second time in five years (UPI)
A zoo in Canada shared a message seeking the return of a parakeet which was stolen for the second time in five years. Perroquets en folie in Montreal shared photos of Paco the parakeet, as well as surveillance footage of an unidentified man that stole the Alexandrine parakeet. "We have your photo and your face on video," they warned the suspect. "We are giving you 24 hours to return our bird or we will be forced to report you to police."