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Newly Impoverished Greenwich Residents May Soon Be Reduced To One Butler A Piece

Pray it doesn't come to that.
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How are things going these days in hedge fund capital Greenwich, Connecticut? Not great! Downright terrible, in fact.

The lonely $250,000 S-Class coupe at Mercedes-Benz of Greenwich says it all. For six months, it’s been sitting in the showroom, shimmering in vain while models priced at only $70,000 fly out the door. “We haven’t had anyone come in and look at it,” says Joey Licari, a sales consultant at the dealership, looking over his shoulder at the silver beauty. “I feel like normally they would, maybe a few years ago.” Such is the state of affairs in Greenwich, the leafy Connecticut town famous for its cluster of hedge funds and the titans of Wall Street who occupy many a gated mansion...Now, with the hedge-fund business struggling and investment-banker incentive pay in a slump, bonus-fueled purchases are cooling again.

It gets worse: while husbands will "still drop $10,000 on jewelry for a 10th anniversary," current finances dictate that a bauble that was previously, in pre-crisis times, considered on par with costume jewelry isn't coming home to celebrate the fact that it's Tuesday.

Ten-carat diamonds that can cost in the six figures collect dust in stores on the main drag.

Before you snicker, stop and think about the fact that the majority of residents are basically now living in huts.

...through Sept. 22, pending sales of homes priced up to $999,999 jumped 29 percent from the same period in 2015, according to brokerage Houlihan Lawrence, and those between $1 million and $1.99 million were up 69 percent. Contracts for homes between $5 million and $5.99 million, meanwhile, fell 80 percent.

All we're saying is, before you mock, walk a mile in their shoes, which are still $1500 a pop but are now being worn multiple times before being thrown in the trash.

Pinching Pennies in the Hedge-Fund Capital of America [Bloomberg via Matt Levine]


Attention Connecticut Residents: Watch Out For Tire Irons To The Face

Among the many reasons typically cited by hedge fund managers who choose to run their business out of Connecticut instead of New York are: 1. The room to stretch their shit out 2. Proximity to the Long Island Sound 3. Convenience for those already living in the area. Some probably also believe that the Fairfield County is slightly safer than New York City. That you're not going to get jumped walking out of the office or beaten with a tire iron because you messed with someone's man or woman. OR WILL YOU?