Bloomberg Chat Suffers Temporary Outage Thus Providing Today's Most Subtle Sign Of Looming Apocalypse

We are truly < FORSAKEN >

We always knew today was going to be terrifying, but even in our darkest premonitions, we never thought it would come to THIS!


Bloomberg terminals’ chat function suffered an outage on Tuesday, forcing finance professionals who rely heavily on the tool to do their job to resort to other forms of communication on a high-stakes day for global markets.

Watching you Bloomberg terminal suddenly decide that you can no longer call out to your colleagues via jargon and acronyms? One might as well envision four pale horsemen <GALLOP> across one's terminal screen. How did Bloomberg cover for this harbinger of the end times?

The outage was caused by “an internal issue,” a person familiar with the situation said.

"Internal issue"? The Dark Lord goes by many names.

And wouldn't it be just like Beezlebub to gaze out upon an Earth beset by war, pestilence and - worst off all - Election Day 2016, turn to his demon servants and hiss "Go forth my hellions and push them all to chat on Symphony."

Bloomberg chat suffers outage [Financial News]