It's a dangerous time to be doing the email, kids.
You got to be careful out there, especially if you're a noted master of finance. Like do you want to getting caught up in an email hack for sending and receiving messages about how bad your CTO's butt looks in his new skinny Aquascutum suit pants? That would be some Brian Moynihan shit right there, bro.
The Khaleesi of Wall Street knows what we're talking about...
Recent email woes among Washington power players have provided yet another reason for bankers to try to protect private correspondence from prying eyes.
Dimon uses email but is known to keep his replies short and factual, favoring "yes," "no" and "thank you."
And even when Jamie is "caught," he's too dry to catch.
That behavior was evident in company emails released by a U.S. Senate committee investigating JPMorgan's $6.2 billion "London Whale" derivatives trading loss. In one message, Dimon replied with a simple "I approve," showing some responsibility but giving no sense of how deeply he was involved with the decision to change risk tolerances at the bank.
And don't even think about drunk-texting J-Dimes about some market-making plan you thought up while staring at the bottom of a shot glass.
After hearing a passing reference to regrettable emails during an interview at a conference two years ago, Dimon volunteered: "Don't send emails after you've had a drink."
Now enjoy your Friday evening like thinking people, you animals.