Brian Moynihan Devastated At Being Denied Dual Chairman-CEO Role At Davos

A staggering insult for America's Saddest Banker.
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We all know that every waking day is a new hell for Brian Moynihan. Despite finally becoming the highest-paid executive at Bank of America this year, the rest of his life remains a ceaselesscascadeofmountingindignities. There's only one thing that gets Moynihan out of bed every morning as he lies there watching the early Boston light creep in to remind him he must spend yet another day as America's saddest bank executive: his dual CEO-chairman role.

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Despised by Jesus and Mike Mayo alike, the combined role remains one of BriMo's few consolations in this imperfect world. So it must have come as a staggering insult that, in picking top roles for Davos this year, the World Economic Forum offered Moynihan just one of the two positions. And it's a co-chair at that, a role he'll share with Meg Whitman and documentary Sharmeen Obaid Chinoy, among others.

What Moynihan will lack in honorary titles, however, he'll make up for in implicit leadership chops. The theme of the ultra-elite confab this year is “Responsive and Responsible Leadership,” (apparently Make Davos Great Again doesn't have much of a ring to it). BriMo knows leadership, alright. He's a double-leader.

He and the rest of Davos will discuss three “gravity centers” – otherwise known as “topics” – this year:

  • strengthening global collaboration
  • restoring a sense of shared identity
  • revitalizing economic growth
  • reforming capitalism
  • preparing for the Fourth Industrial Revolution

Sounds like a blast. Have fun reforming capitalism, Brian, and sorry again about the CEO thing.

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