Let's just get this out of the way right up front. The Dow hitting 20,000 is great and important and worthwhile. Not because the number isn't fundamentally arbitrary – it most certainly is – but because the universe is fundamentally arbitrary and it's our job as humans to derive meaning and value wherever we can. The Dow is literally a measure of value, and the base-ten mathematical system is humankind's most basic attempt to divine some meaning from the chaos of the world.
So let's celebrate this nice big round number and try to call the close.
The thing came within a few little tenths of a percentage point around 12:40 p.m. before fizzling out, as all human endeavors ultimately do. But we've got a few hours before the bell sounds for the weekend, and there's gotta be enough traders out there willing to say YOLO and push us over the edge. Right?
Because no one wants to own this hat.
Rules: Once we hit 20,000 intraday, game on. As in Price is Right, the closest guess to the post-20K close without going over wins. Entries in by 3:45 p.m. Eastern. Winner gets a sleek and fetching Dealbreaker banker bag.
UPDATE: No dice. Nothing matters.