Welcome to the newest installment of our favorite new soap opera, "How The Deutsche Bank Turns."
So, according to a source, it turns out that the Deutsche Bank Senior MD who reportedly got up at a firm town hall in London and spoke from his ass about Deutsche making everyone whole on their bonuses next year after giving the 2016 ones to the United States Department of Justice, was none other than Alasdair Warren, DB's Head of Corporate & Investment Banking Europe, Middle East and Africa.
And it also seems that jolly old Alasdair has now had to do a little covering of said ass. Per our source:
Turns out that Mr AW so mid-managed the town hall on Monday that DB is now accelerating increases in base salary for Associates, VPs and Ds. He somehow forgot that he's only responsible for European I-banking. He made statements that the rest of the bank (including his own department) couldn't possibly keep. His version of "alternative facts" it would seem.
Well, at least AW now knows what it must feel like to be Sean Spicer. But did Deutsche's head of Euro I-Banking do enough to quell the fear and anger of Deutsche's Euro I-Bankers?
In a word; Nein!
All mighty hell has broken loose; this week most traders in London didn't arrive on the floor until 8.15am - a good 45min later than usual. DB management THINKS not paying producers is a free option for the bank. DB producers KNOW that staying at DB until a better offer arrives is their free option. Time will tell. Annual results out soon and we'll see what senior folks are paid...
So Deutsche's London trading floor now has the feel of a Mike Judge movie:
[INT: Deutsche Bank trading floor, City of London. Bloomberg terminals sit dark as empty seats outnumber occupied ones. The trading has begun, yet the room is troublingly quiet. ALASDAIR WARREN paces nervously. A disheveled and unkempt TRADER saunters in, slumps into his chair and begins playing Candy Crush on his iPhone. WARREN approaches]
WARREN: Looks like you've missed the Opening Bell.
TRADER: [Without looking up from iPhone] I wouldn't say I missed it, Al.