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Opening Bell: 4.19.17

Morgan Stanley does victory lap around Goldman; Treasury Department wants your opinion on century bonds; which emoji makes the best sex toy?; and more.
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Morgan Stanley Beats Estimates as Fixed-Income Revenue Doubles (BBG)
“We reported one of our strongest quarters in recent years,” Chief Executive Officer James Gorman said in the statement. “All our businesses performed well in improved market conditions. We are confident in our business model and the opportunities ahead, while recognizing that the environment remains uncertain.”

Economist Zandi, who predicted a 'lengthy recession' under Trump, changes his tune (CNBC)
"Trump detractors who believe the new president will quickly drive the economy into a ditch are overly pessimistic," he said. "Sustained economic growth is possible, but will require that Trump supporters and detractors find a way to work together."

Aaron Hernandez, Former New England Patriots Star, Found Dead in Prison Cell (NBC)
Correction officers discovered Hernandez hanged by a bed sheet attached to his cell window at about 3:05 a.m., said Christopher M. Fallon, assistant deputy commissioner of communications for the state Department of Correction. The former football star had attempted to "block his door from the inside by jamming the door with various items," Fallon said in a statement.

Former Harvard Money Whiz Jack Meyer Tries to Regain Midas Touch (WSJ)
Jack Meyer says he used to think 80% of active managers didn’t add value but now thinks it is closer to 95%. Convexity is in that remaining 5%, he said.

US Treasury tests appetite for ‘ultra-long’ bonds (FT)
The Treasury survey focused on the following areas: “What factors should Treasury consider when structuring a security with a maturity greater than 30 years (eg, 40-, 50- or 100-year)? At what price, relative to the current 30-year bond offering, could Treasury reasonably expect an ultra-long to price?”

Here’s Where London Bankers Are Moving After Brexit (BBG)
TheCityUK lobby group forecasts that as many 70,000 financial services jobs are at risk, though estimates vary widely. The implications for the U.K. are potentially substantial: finance and related professional services bring in some £190 billion ($240 billion) a year, representing 12 percent of the British economy.

Bill O’Reilly’s Future at Fox Grows Dim as the Murdochs’ Support Erodes (NYT)
The woman reported that in 2008, Mr. O’Reilly would stop by her desk and grunt like a “wild boar”; he would also stand back to allow her to exit the elevator first and then say, “Looking good, girl,” Ms. Bloom said. Mr. O’Reilly leered at the woman’s cleavage and legs and called her “hot chocolate,” Ms. Bloom said.

A history of global living conditions in 5 charts (Our World In Data)

Markets Start to Ponder the $13 Trillion Gorilla in the Room (BBG)
Underscoring just how diverse the programs have become, the ECB’s securities purchases have included French yogurt-maker bonds, while the BOJ’s holdings through exchange traded funds include shares of Japan’s top soy-sauce brewer.

Harbert Reaches $40 Million Tax Settlement With New York (NYT)
An investigation by Mr. Schneiderman’s office found that Harbert paid no state taxes on the profits generated by Harbinger from 2004 to 2009, even though the hedge fund and Mr. Falcone were based in Manhattan. “Harbert Management made a clear choice to skirt the rules, and as a result, ordinary New York taxpayers were left footing the bill,” Mr. Schneiderman said.

How Google eats a business whole (The Outline)
“It’s a big ask. Like, ‘hey, let us tap into the most valuable thing that you have, that has taken years to create and we’ve spent literally millions of dollars, and just give it to us for free so we can display it.’ At the end of it, we just said ‘look, we’re not comfortable with this.’ But then they went ahead and took the data anyway.”

The Eggplant Emoji Has Found Its True Purpose As A Vibrator (HuffPo)
As for which toy is more in demand, the eggplant may be the original emojibator, but the chili sex toy is quickly eclipsing it in popularity. “We’ve actually heard more and more that the chili pepper is the preferred stimulator,” Jandler said. “It’s curved shape and flexible tip allow for increased pleasure.”


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Opening Bell: 1.6.17

Lean times ahead for Morgan Stanley traders; Jesse Livtak's “used car” defense; love and betrayal at Snapchat; and more.

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Opening Bell: 7.20.17

Goldman is losing ground to Morgan Stanley; John Cryan sees a hard Brexit coming; doctors found 27 contact lenses in some lady's eye; and more.

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Opening Bell: 4.5.17

Morgan Stanley analysts don't need your stinkin' math; Lacker ain't the leaker; "Drunk Lives Matter"; and more.

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Opening Bell: 11.17.17

Morgan Stanley is walloping Goldman in commodities; Elon Musk rolls out a(n allegedly) very fast car; robot backflips; and more.

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Opening Bell: 1.4.18

Morgan Stanley calls a top; Jeremy Grantham calls for a melt-up; Merrill Lynch issues fatwa against bitcoin; and much more

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Opening Bell 7.18.18

Google gets fined; Elon apologizes; Morgan Stanley beats; High-heel Crocs and more!


Opening Bell: 3.15.17

Jamie Dimon still working on his Business Roundtable talking points; Ackman lost some money; sex toy snoops on users; and more.


Opening Bell: 4.28.17

Trader has a rough start at Goldman; Dalio loves getting abuse from his employees; meet the world's best sex-bot; and more.