Opening Bell: 4.20.17

Ousted Arconic CEO Sent a Vague Threat to Activist Hedge-Fund Boss (WSJ)
The letter, sent last week to Elliott Management Corp., referenced the alleged partying of Elliott’s president, Paul Singer, at the 2006 World Cup in Germany, Mr. Kleinfeld’s home country. Mr. Kleinfeld wrote, in sometimes imperfect English, that while the two had never met, he had heard stories from friends in Germany about what the letter called Mr. Singer’s “legendary” conduct during and after several matches. The letter alludes to the Wall Street magnate singing “Singing in the Rain” in a fountain. Mr. Kleinfeld added that he had been looking for an Indian headdress to send to Mr. Singer. It isn’t clear what he meant by that.

The Bond Market Prefers Dictators to Democracies (BBG)
"Investors typically view the bonds of an autocratic regime very negatively and assign a very high default probability," said Victor Fu, the director of emerging-market sovereign strategy at Stifel Nicolaus & Co. But "in an autocratic regime, the government remaining in power is considered more important than people’s welfare. Since a bond default likely will raise the risks for the government to be thrown out, the ruling party will do its best to prevent a credit event."

Goldman Sachs just abandoned one of its ‘top trades of 2017’ (MarketWatch)
The reversal essentially amounts to a mea culpa for the bank’s sell-side strategy department, which has repeatedly found itself wrong-footed on the dollar in recent years. After accurately anticipating that the buck would rise in 2013, The investment bank’s former top currency strategist Thomas Stolper reversed his view in December of that year, before leaving the bank two months later. Clients who took his advice missed out on one of the most dramatic rallies in the greenback’s history.

Bank Regulator Rips Its Own Supervision of Wells Fargo Sales Practices (WSJ)
The OCC report amounts to a detailed critique of alleged failures at the agency, the primary regulator of Wells Fargo. It found that supervisors were aware of complaints about the sales program, including a meeting with a senior Wells Fargo executive in January 2010 at which they inquired about 700 whistleblower complaints “related to the gaming of incentive plans.”

The Other Side (Irrelevant Investor)
Since 1970, there have been 17 days where the S&P 500 gained at least 5%, and 21 where it lost more than 5%. Therefore, it’s more likely that a coin flipper would have missed big down days than up days. If missing the 25 best days took your returns from a 10 to a 4, then missing the 25 worst days took your returns from a 10 to a 25.

First U.S. drive-through marijuana store to open in Colorado (Reuters)
“You actually drive into the building," Mark Smith, chief executive of Tumbleweed, the company that owns the new store and six other pot shops in the state, said. "A door opens up and you drive the car into the building and then the door closes behind you, like in a Jiffy Lube. So in essence, you’re inside the dispensary, but in a vehicle.”

Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze (BBG)
Doug Evans, the company’s founder, would compare himself with Steve Jobs in his pursuit of juicing perfection. He declared that his juice press wields four tons of force—“enough to lift two Teslas,” he said. Google’s venture capital arm and other backers poured about $120 million into the startup. Juicero sells the machine for $400, plus the cost of individual juice packs delivered weekly. Tech blogs have dubbed it a “Keurig for juice.” But after the product hit the market, some investors were surprised to discover a much cheaper alternative: You can squeeze the Juicero bags with your bare hands.

JPMorgan Said to Plan Tripling Size of New York Technology Hub (BBG)
The firm’s West Side hub, which opened in late 2015, caters to millennials by mimicking startup culture, with foosball tables, a game room, industrial decor and fridges stocked with sodas and snacks.

Frank and Steven’s Excellent Corporate-Raiding Adventure (Atlantic)
Public markets, he said, enabled Tejon Ranch to operate under much less short-term pressure, and to take a longer-term perspective. We were flabbergasted: Many companies go private or stay private to avoid the short-term pressure that public markets can create. But the fact is, for companies the size of Tejon Ranch—and there are thousands of them, filling the portfolios of mutual funds and pension funds, even though most investors have never heard their name—Bielli is probably right. Because so many investors are passive today, most CEOs can relax, even if their performance is mediocre.

Florida tennis match interrupted by copulating couple's sexual sounds (UPI)
The Tuesday night match between Frances Tiafoe and Mitchell Krueger, part of the ATP Challenger Tour, came to a brief stop when the court was filled with the sounds of enthusiastic lovemaking. "It can't be that good," an amused Tiafoe shouted from the court. Video from the event shows a mother in the stands instructing her young son to cover his ears.