Opening Bell: 4.24.17

Why Goldman whiffed its earnings; how Travis Kalanick earned a tongue-lashing from Tim Cook; meet hoverboard dentist; and more.
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Goldman Said to Get Burned by These Debts in Rare Trading Miss (BBG)
Goldman Sachs held roughly $200 million in Peabody bonds, about 10 times more than other major dealers, as the coal miner prepared earlier this year to exit bankruptcy protection, according to data from Securities and Exchange Commission filings and a person with knowledge of the restructuring’s terms. Those bonds would have lost about $40 million this year as their value slumped.

Lloyd Zoom

Tesla’s big Model 3 bet rides on risky assembly line strategy (Reuters)
Musk’s decision underscores his high-risk tolerance and willingness to forego long-held industry norms that has helped Tesla upend the traditional auto industry. While Tesla is not the first automaker to try to accelerate production on the factory floor, no other rival is putting this much faith in the production strategy succeeding.

Charts Show Traders Writing Down Chances of a Le Pen Presidency (BBG)
“There’s certainly a change that’s been demanded from the electorate, but it’s a more balanced view and that’s good for markets,” said UBS Asset Management’s Anderson. “It’s pro-growth, with a less protectionist slant.”

Adaptive Markets, by Andrew Lo — emotional investment theory (FT)
Lo has for years offered the adaptive markets hypothesis as an alternative [to efficient markets]. Borrowing from Darwinian biology, his idea is that markets develop and adapt over time. They cannot be modelled using concepts from physics, but can be viewed biologically as a complex ecosystem. And they will often behave as though they are efficient.

The Most Dangerous Narratives are Usually the Smartest (PragCap)
When you consider risk parity AUM of $150B and capital weight of 30% the numbers and the frequency of rebalancing get too small to move the markets. It just doesn’t add up that $45B of assets being rebalanced infrequently in trillion dollar markets is somehow creating crash risk.

Sears owner has milked iconic retailer dry, analysts say (NYP)
“Eddie will be able to sell off a lot of assets very much like in a Gordon Gekko-style scenario, and at least get paid back some of the secured notes he has made to the company,” said Prosperity Financial Group CEO Andrew Denney. “The tag line is how Eddie is cashing in as Sears is cashing out.”

Uber’s C.E.O. Plays With Fire (NYT)
For months, Mr. Kalanick had pulled a fast one on Apple by directing his employees to help camouflage the ride-hailing app from Apple’s engineers. The reason? So Apple would not find out that Uber had been secretly identifying and tagging iPhones even after its app had been deleted and the devices erased — a fraud detection maneuver that violated Apple’s privacy guidelines.

What city is the microbrew capital of the US? (Pudding)
Craft beer — so hot right now. Could Brooklyn, New York, really be the microbrew capital of the US? Nope.

Alaska's Most Xtreme Dentist Allegedly Pulls Tooth While Riding Hoverboard (Gizmodo)
Lookhart texted the video to his office manager, joking that the procedure represented a “new standard of care.” When interviewed by authorities, the patient reportedly said she did not know about Lookhart’s behavior.

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Opening Bell: 10.10.12

Banks Must Cut Deeper to Help Stock Prices, McKinsey Says (Bloomberg) Banks must make deeper and more sweeping cost reductions if they want to restore profitability levels that are acceptable to investors, McKinsey & Co. said in an annual review of the industry. “It has to go a lot further,” Toos Daruvala, a director in the consulting firm’s North American banking practice and a co-author of the report, said yesterday in a phone interview. “Banks have done quite a lot on cost-cutting but frankly the environment has deteriorated over the last year” because of economic weakness, he said. Argentina rejects Singer’s $20M in ransom for ship’s release (NYP) At a court hearing today in Ghana, where hedge fund manager Paul Singer’s lawyers are holding the ARA Libertad hostage, a lawyer for Argentina argued that Singer had no right to detain the ship because it’s a military vessel and immune from seizure. Lawyer Larry Otoo called the seizure — a move by Singer to force Argentina to repay a $1.6 billion debt he says he’s owed — an embarrassment to Ghana and demanded the ship’s immediate return. The court is expected to rule Thursday on whether to release the ship. Singer, the head of hedge fund giant Elliot Management, is seeking to recoup some of the $600 million in bonds he purchased as Argentina was headed for default in 2001. Elliot bought the bonds at steep discounts, paying as little as 15 cents on the dollar in some cases, but has since won judgments of as much as $1.6 billion. Elliot’s NML Capital unit is pursuing Argentina’s assets all over the world in an effort to collect on its debt. In Gupta Sentencing, A Judgment Call (WSJ) Former Goldman Sachs Group Inc. director Rajat Gupta is the highest-profile of more than 70 defendants convicted of insider trading in New York federal court in the past three years. But this month he will likely receive a more lenient sentence than the 11-year-prison term given to Raj Rajaratnam, to whom Mr. Gupta provided his illegal leaks, legal experts say. The sentence may have reverberations beyond the 63-year-old Mr. Gupta, a former chief of consulting giant McKinsey & Co. It will be widely watched in executive suites nationwide because it will be among the first handed down to a major corporate figure in the recent insider-trading crackdown. Previous sentences have largely involved traders, lawyers, lower-rung corporate employees and others. Mr. Gupta, who was convicted in June of three counts of securities fraud relating to tips about Goldman and one count of conspiracy, didn't trade or profit directly from his illegal tips. Before the conviction, he had a long and stellar career in corporate America and philanthropy. All this will be balanced against the nature of the crimes and the need to discourage others from similar offenses when U.S. District Judge Jed Rakoff hands down his sentence, scheduled for Oct. 24. Judge Rakoff often imposes sentences further below federal sentencing guidelines than some other judges do, according to a Wall Street Journal analysis...Since 2010, Judge Rakoff has imposed an average sentence of 21 months on insider-trading defendants who didn't cooperate with prosecutors—about 38% below the guideline minimum, according to the Journal analysis. By comparison, U.S. District Judge Richard Sullivan issued seven sentences in that period averaging 6.3% below the guideline minimum. U.S. District Judge Paul Crotty issued three sentences at 20.3% less than the minimum. Goldman Pushes On Limits In Volcker Rule (WSJ) Some executives at the New York company believe they have found a way to extricate the credit funds from proposed limits on how much can be invested in hedge funds and private-equity funds, according to people briefed on the efforts. The Volcker rule caps a bank's total investments in hedge funds and private-equity funds at 3% of its so-called Tier-1 capital. It also prevents any single bank from accounting for more than 3% of a fund's investments. Those limits are among the biggest components of the rule, named after former Federal Reserve Chairman Paul Volcker and designed to curtail risk-taking among financial firms. The rule is the most contentious part of the Dodd-Frank financial-overhaul law of 2010 but, like much of the rest of the legislation, the details of its implementation are still being worked out. Credit funds lend to companies that might not otherwise get financing, such as companies backed by private-equity firms, and tend to hold their investments to maturity while using a limited amount of leverage. Goldman has argued in meetings with regulators and in letters to them that these funds function like banks, just with a different structure, according to public records and the people familiar with the efforts. Report: 20% of US Firms Cook the Books During Earnings (CNBC) ...a new report by finance professors at Emory and Duke University raises questions about the quality of earnings in general. In an anonymous survey of CFOs last year, the study found that at least 20% of companies are "managing" earnings and using aggressive accounting methods to legally alter the outcome of their earnings reports. Of the 20% of companies that manipulated their earnings to hit a target, Graham says, a surprising 40% did so to the downside, not the upside, to pad and improve future quarters' earnings. Banks Chasing Asian Millionaires Create Singapore’s Canary Wharf (Bloomberg) Singapore’s Marina Bay area is emerging as the city’s new financial hub, with banks including Standard Chartered Plc and Barclays taking bigger offices as they pursue Asia’s expanding ranks of millionaires. Corrections & Amplifications (WSJ via Lauren Tara LaCapra) "Annie Hubbard, the woman appearing alongside Goldman Sachs's chief financial officer, Harvey Schwartz, in a photograph with a page-one article about Goldman on Tuesday, was incorrectly identified as his wife. Mr. Schwartz isn't married." Hulk Hogan ‘devastated’ by leak of sex tape filmed six years ago with friend’s wife Heather Clem (NYDN) The wrestling star tried to explain the kinky love triangle to Howard Stern Tuesday using a thinly veiled euphemism. “Let’s say I’ve been doing laundry, brother, for this person forever, and all of a sudden this person hates the way I do laundry. And that person says, ‘You suck. I hate you. F-you every single day. I hate the way you do laundry. I’m going to find somebody else to do laundry. Somebody younger, faster, stronger,’” he said, clearly taking a jab at his ex-wife, who he was still married to at the time of the taping. “But my buddy, you know, him and his girl say, ‘Hey, you can do our laundry any time you want!’ Both of them are saying that,” he told Stern. “Finally after the person I was doing laundry with for millions and millions of years left, and all of a sudden there was nobody there to do laundry, I was depressed… I go to my buddy’s house and he says, ‘Hey man you can do this other person’s laundry that I’m partners with.’ I said, 'Sure.’” Official Warmth And Public Rage For A German Leader In Athens (NYT) ...even as Ms. Merkel said that she had come as a “good friend and a real partner,” not a “taskmaster or teacher to give grades,” the approximately 40,000 Greeks who took to the streets in protest (a rather modest number, by Greek standards) treated the visit as a provocation by the arch-nemesis in the euro crisis whose austerity medicine is obliterating the Greek middle class. Some banners read “Don’t cry for us Mrs. Merkel” and “Merkel, you are not welcome here.” A small group of protesters burned a flag bearing the Nazi swastika, while a handful of protesters dressed in Nazi-style uniforms drew cheers of approval as they rode a small vehicle past a police cordon. Variety Being Sold To Penske, Third Point (Reuters) Variety, the century-old entertainment trade newspaper once considered the bible of the movie industry, is being sold to online publisher Jay Penske and Third Point LLC for about $25 million, two sources with knowledge of the deal told Reuters. Penske and Third Point have struck a deal to buy the money-losing, 107-year-old newspaper from medical and technical publisher Reed Elsevier, which put it up for sale in March, the sources said. IMF warns eurozone on capital flight (FT) In its global financial stability report, the IMF concluded that capital flight from the eurozone’s periphery to the bloc’s core, driven by fears of a break-up of the currency union, had sparked “extreme fragmentation” of the euro area’s funding markets. The fund said this was causing renewed pressure for banks to shrink their balance sheets, particularly those in countries with fiscal woes. A Fat, Mustachioed Orphan Finds a Home (NYT) How do you transport a 234-pound baby to New York City? If he’s a 15-week-old walrus rescued from the open ocean off Alaska, the answer is a jumbo-size crate aboard a FedEx cargo jet, accompanied by a veterinarian and a handler. “If he’s calm and comfortable, no worries,” said Jon Forrest Dohlin, director of the New York Aquarium, which will receive the walrus calf, named Mitik, on Thursday. “But his needs and comfort come first. So he may very well travel with his head in our keeper’s lap.” Since late July, Mitik and a second orphaned walrus, Pakak, have been nursed to health with bottle feedings and exercise at the Alaska SeaLife Center, an aquarium in Seward that conducts research and responds to strandings of marine mammals. (Pakak, nicknamed Pak, will arrive at the Indianapolis Zoo on Thursday.) Mitik — or Mit, for short — was weak from illness and considerably smaller than Pakak when he was found by a hunting vessel several miles offshore. Mit initially suffered from bladder problems and could not take a bottle, requiring both a catheter and feeding tube. But he is now sucking assertively from a bottle and putting on a pound a day...With his multiple chins and doleful expression, Mit is also exhibiting an undeniable pluck that should serve him well in his new surroundings. Martha Hiatt, the aquarium’s behavioral husbandry supervisor, traveled to Alaska in September to help care for him. At first, she said, Pakak totally dominated him, but no longer. “If Mit is resting with his head on my lap, sucking my fingers, looking sweetly into my eyes, and Pak comes anywhere near us, he pops up, yells at Pak and tries to head-butt him,” she said. “Then he’ll turn to me and be all cuddly again. We say he is small, but scrappy — the perfect New Yorker.”

Opening Bell: 10.09.12

Stress For Banks As Tests, Loom (WSJ) U.S. banks and the Federal Reserve are battling over a new round of "stress tests" even before the annual exams get going later this fall. The clash centers on the math regulators are using to produce the results. Bankers want more detail on how the calculations are made, and the Fed thus far has resisted disclosing more than it has already. A senior Fed supervision official, Timothy Clark, irked some bankers last month when he said at a private conference they wouldn't get additional information about the methodology, according to people who attended the event in Boston. Wells Fargo Treasurer Paul Ackerman said at the same conference that he still doesn't understand why the Fed's estimates are so different from Wells's. His remarks drew applause from bankers in the audience, said the people who attended. Bonus Round Is Over (NYP) Wall Street traders, among the best paid in financial circles, are facing another meager bonus season this year — at least by Street standards — after a rough 2011 saw bonuses slashed by as much as 30 percent. Although some groups will fare better than others, equity traders could see their prized bonuses shredded again in 2012 — by as much as 35 percent, according to recruiters and others. In addition to lower bonuses, Wall Streeters are likely to see less of the payout in cash and more in stock — with the stock facing longer deferral periods, one recruiter, Michael Karp, co-founder of Options Group, said. Deutsche Bank has already moved from three-year deferral periods to stricter five-year deferrals and it’s expected that other banks will follow suit. IMF Sees ‘Alarmingly High’ Risk of Deeper Global Slump (Bloomberg) The world economy will grow 3.3 percent this year, the slowest since the 2009 recession, and 3.6 percent next year, the IMF said today, compared with July predictions of 3.5 percent in 2012 and 3.9 percent in 2013. The Washington-based lender now sees “alarmingly high” risks of a steeper slowdown, with a one-in-six chance of growth slipping below 2 percent. Depositors Turn Up Heat On Ailing Spanish Banks (WSJ) Eugenio Nuñez Cobás stormed into a bank branch in this coastal town one morning in August with three dozen fellow customers yelling "Thieves! Thieves! Thieves!" Then they returned to the street and pelted the facade with eggs, forcing the branch to close for the day. Athens Preparing for Anti-Austerity Protests Aimed at Merkel (Bloomberg) Greece’s capital will grind to a halt today for German Chancellor Angela Merkel’s first visit since the financial crisis began, with 7,000 officers deployed around Athens to prevent violence at planned protests. Authorities have declared entire sections of downtown off- limits, notably Prime Minister Antonis Samaras’s office, where the two leaders, will meet and the German embassy. Merkel is due to arrive at 1:30 p.m., around the same time as three separate protest marches gather in front of Parliament. Can Marissa Mayer Really Have It All? (NYM) When faced with a difficult decision, Mayer likes to create a spreadsheet. She went to Stanford as an undergrad, switching from pre-med to an esoteric major called “symbolic systems,” which is a mixture of philosophy, brain science, and artificial intelligence (anybody anywhere can do pre-med, she thought), and then continued on, getting an advanced degree in computer science. She entered the job market in the spring of 1999, at the height of the dot-com boom, and got more than a dozen offers—from several dot-coms, including Google (she interviewed with Page and Sergey Brin at a Ping-Pong table), and one from McKinsey & Co. “I like to do matrices,” she told NPR. “One option per line, different facets for each column. Salary, location, happiness index, failure index, and all that.” That spring, her matrix pointed her toward Google. “To my credit, I actually gave Google a hundred times more likely chance of succeeding than any of the other start-ups [from which she got offers], because I gave them a 2 percent chance of success. I gave all the other start-ups a .02 percent chance of success.” A Beacon For DC, By Ben Bernanke (WSJ) People decry the absence of leadership in Washington these days. My response: Look no further than the home-team dugout at Nationals Park. Under Manager Davey Johnson's confident, laid-back leadership, the Washington Nationals, defying all preseason conventional wisdom, have claimed the 2012 championship of the National League Eastern Division and the best regular-season record in Major League Baseball...Davey, who earned a degree in mathematics from Trinity University, is the epitome of the head-and-heart consensus. He was an early proponent of the use of statistical analysis in baseball decision-making, and it is clear in his tactical management of games that he is very conversant with sabermetric principles. He well understands, for instance, how to use statistics in determining lineups and pitcher-hitter matchups. At the same time, Davey is also really good at identifying and nurturing talent. Most strikingly, he has shown himself willing to sacrifice short-term tactical advantage for the long-term benefit of bolstering the confidence of a player in whom he sees great potential. He lets players play through slumps and gives pitchers who have gotten behind a chance to dig themselves out. His reasoning: Giving a promising player the opportunity the prove himself will often do more for the team in the long run than making an ostensibly better tactical decision in the short run—even if it costs the team a game or two. McKinsey casts gloomy eye on world banking (Reuters) Banks worldwide remain scarred by the 2007-2009 financial crisis and are years away from developing new business models that will produce sustainable profits, according to a new study. Despite progress in meeting regulators' requirements to build capital, revenue growth is slow, costs are rising and new competitors exploiting digital technologies are emerging, McKinsey & Co said in a report released on Monday evening. Obama's Next Fed Chief: Who Gets The Job If Obama Wins Second Term? (WaPo) The top contenders are: Ben Bernanke, Larry Summers, Janet Yellen, Roger Ferguson, Bill Dudley, Tim Geithner, and Don Kohn. Man Dies After Live Roach-Eating Contest In Florida (AP) The winner of a roach-eating contest in South Florida died shortly after downing dozens of the live bugs as well as worms, authorities said Monday. About 30 contestants ate the insects during Friday night's contest at Ben Siegel Reptile Store in Deerfield Beach about 40 miles north of Miami. The grand prize was a python. Edward Archbold, 32, of West Palm Beach became ill shortly after the contest ended and collapsed in front of the store, according to a Broward Sheriff's Office statement released Monday. He was taken to the hospital where he was pronounced dead. Authorities were waiting for results of an autopsy to determine a cause of death...None of the other contestants became ill, the sheriff's office said. There was no updated phone number listed for Archbold in West Palm Beach. "We feel terribly awful," said store owner Ben Siegel, who added that Archbold did not appear to be sick before the contest. "He looked like he just wanted to show off and was very nice," Siegel said, adding that Archbold was "the life of the party."