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Regardless Of Financials, Tesla Shattered All Elon Musk Expectations For Q1 2017

If you read closely, you can see where the ayahuasca Elon drank before the earnings call kicks in during the Q&A.

John Lennon said The Beatles were "bigger than Jesus," Kanye West has warned us all repeatedly that we are recklessly ignoring his generational brilliance, and Nikola Tesla coined the famous lament "I have always been ahead of my time."


Oh, speaking of Tesla, didn't his namesake car company report earnings yesterday? How did that go?

ELON MUSK: Cool. All right, so yeah, we'll just go right into Q&A. Overall, I'm very proud of Tesla for our accomplishments in the first quarter, and I think second quarter is going to be great too. And, yeah, so overall I think we're executing well. And I'm feeling quite optimistic about the future.

Tesla beat revenue by a comfy little margin ($2.7B vs $2.62B) but also reported a considerably deeper loss per share of $1.33 than the expected 81 cents. So like any CEO of a company looking to push the narrative of a mixed quarter, Elon obviously took a careful tone in predicting what Tesla would do going forward. He was optimistic, sure, but he wasn't going to get carried away when pressed on the macro limits of electric power in the future of transportation:

ELON MUSK: Yeah, I'm not sure what you're saying. I'm absolutely confident that electric powered trains will – electric vehicles will occupy every segment without exception. And I don't want to jump the gun on the Tesla Semi truck unveiling later this year, but I think, it's going to be a good (3:54) product, and will defy people's expectations on what an electric truck can do. So I really do not see any segment of transport that will not be electric, in fact I'm highly confident that all transport will go fully electric with the ironic exception of rockets. Yeah, just kidding.

Oh good, he wedged a space reference in there. Well, then he must of at least selected his word delicately when talking about the infamously confusing pricing and comps on Tesla's upcoming Model 3 release...

ELON MUSK: There have been roughly four versions of Model S, and we're on the fourth version of Model 3, will be also version 4. It's a little confusing, because one's a letter and the other's a number. But Model 3 was supposed to be called the Model E. But then Ford intended to sue us, and then I thought we were being all clever by calling it the Model 3, but actually the joke's on me, because it caused confusion in the marketplace, so we're doing our best to clear up that confusion so people do not think that Model 3 is somehow superior to Model S. Actually Model S will be better than Model 3, as it should be, because it's a more expensive car.

Jesus H. Kanye, he just won't stop talking...As long as no one asks him about making one million cars a year this shouldn't get too out of hand...

TYLER CHARLES FRANK, BAIRD & CO.: Right, okay. And just, Elon you had previously pulled out a target of a million cars per year by 2020. Do you still think that's achievable? And what needs to take place in order to get there?
ELON MUSK: Yeah, I do. I think we need to come out with the Model Y sometime in 2020 or aspirationally late 2019. And then I think that a million units is quite likely, combined, yeah. Maybe more.

This fucking guy, unbridled and unafraid without going the full Lennon. Being confident and pushing the envelope is badass but even Elon won't compare Tesla t the Jesus that is Apple...

BRIAN JOHNSON, BARCLAYS: Okay. Second, a couple years ago when the stock was at $200, in answer to one of my questions, Elon, you outlined a scenario where you could get to $700 billion in market cap. That's about where Apple was at the time. We're two years later, you're obviously close to the Model 3 launch, how are you looking at that?
ELON MUSK: Well, now I may want to preface this by of course I could be completely delusional, but I think I see a clear path to that outcome...The set of steps necessary to achieve that outcome seems pretty obvious. I am heavily involved in Tesla going – incredibly good at the machine that builds the machine. Which involves, by the way, a tremendous amount of software. This is not just a bunch of robots that are sitting there. It's the programming of robots and how they interact. And it's far more complex than the software in the car. I mean, I think, this is just going to be a very difficult thing for other manufacturers to copy. I would not know what to do if I were in their position.

Word of advice here: It you have to preface a statement with the potential of your own delusion on an earnings call, stop FUCKING TALKING. And definitely don't keep talking about building robots to build robots so robots can learn to love robots lest you come off sounding like the ayahuasca you drank during introductions is finally kicking in. We're not saying that Elon reached peak crazy on this call, but look what he did to poor Jimmy Cramer:

That's not right, Elon, you don't just break The Cramer.



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