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EU Brexit Negotiator Stops Giggling Long Enough To Address British Election Result


Like any self-respecting Frenchman given the cosmic gift of Britain embarrassing itself, European Chief Negotiator for Brexit Michel Barnier is looking at the results of Theresa May's malt vinegar-covered clusterfuck of an election and attempting to throw the perfect amount of Gallic shade at the dumbest Prime Minister to call an election since her predecessor.


"Brexit negotiations should start when UK is ready; timetable and EU positions are clear. Let's put our minds together on striking a deal," Michel Barnier said after Prime Minister Theresa May lost her majority in a snap British election, bringing more uncertainty to the divorce negotiations.

May was looking to pick up a few more seats in Parliament to strengthen her pimp hand at the Brexit bargain table. Her Conservative Party lost 10 seats and she ended up giving her blood-enemy Jeremy Corbyn a major victory as his Labour picked up 29 seats. How unexpected was that?

The pound also did this against the dollar as British exit polls started rolling in:


We're not saying that May has weakened her Brexit bargaining position but Alexis Tsipras is sitting in Athens going "Wow, even I have more leverage than those pale lunatics."

So we're looking forward to seeing whoever May picks to send to Brussels on her behalf to get the "best" deal available on Brexit. Hey that person might even stand a snowball's chance in hell of getting something once Barnier and his team stop pointing and laughing. And by "something" we're thinking a guaranteed extra spot in the Eurovision Song Contest or an opportunity to deport Russell Brand to Slovakia.

And if May is looking for someone to sacrifice, we have just the guy:


Enjoy your weekend, Britain!

Brexit talks should start when Britain ready: EU negotiator [Reuters]



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