JPMorgan smashes Wall Street estimates (CNBC)
Average loans in consumer and community banking rose 3 percent from the same quarter last year, while core loans climbed 9 percent. Looking forward to the rest of the year, JPMorgan said it expects average core loan growth to rise 8 percent. However, overall markets revenue declined 14 percent year-on-year. Fixed income trading fell 19 percent, "due to reduced flows driven by sustained low volatility and tighter credit spreads, against a strong prior year."

Vanguard CEO Bill McNabb to Step Down (WSJ)
“My goal has always been to leave the woodpile higher than where I found it,” Mr. McNabb said in an interview. “I think that’s the right amount of time for someone to run an organization like Vanguard,” he said referring to his tenure as CEO. “It’s complex, it’s all consuming, and it’s good to get fresh perspective, even with the kind of continuity we have here.”

At Goldman, He’s David Solomon. At the Club, He’s D.J. D-Sol. (NYT)
A roughly 30-second clip shot during the performance on July 4 depicts Mr. Solomon, wearing a baseball cap with headphones over it and a T-shirt bearing the name of Casamigos Tequila, adjusting the music as women in bikinis and shirtless men wearing board shorts dance on a deck below. Speakers blast music from the roof of the club, which was holding its weekly pig roast that day.

Self-Driving Taxis Could Have a Vomit Problem (BBG)
It didn’t take long for Pritam Singh to learn a key lesson about working for Lyft. People are disgusting. They have a nasty habit of throwing up in moving vehicles. Rideshare drivers are acutely aware that customers tend to do that, along with slightly less annoying things like wiping hamburger-greasy fingers on armrests and turning floor mats into swamps of slush. Singh, who ferries passengers for Lyft Inc. in Manhattan several evenings a week, drops about $200 a month cleaning -- really, sometimes it feels like sanitizing -- his Toyota Camry. That casts a pall on the idea, held dear by the likes of Uber co-founder Travis Kalanick, that the advent of self-driving will swiftly make ridesharing so cheap that most Americans won’t bother to own their own vehicles.

Man Stuck Inside ATM Rescued After Slipping Customers Terrifying Notes (Gizmodo)
The contractor spent the next two hours slipping notes to bank customers at the drive-through ATM that had become his own personal hell. “Please help,” one of the notes read. “I’m stuck in here and I don’t have my phone. Please call my boss…” Apparently, several customers thought the scribbled messages were a prank and ignored them until one patron got sufficiently spooked.

ECB wary of putting end-date on quantitative easing (Reuters)
The European Central Bank is keen to keep its asset purchases open-ended rather than setting a potentially distant date on which bond-buying will stop, to retain flexibility in case the outlook sours, three sources familiar with the discussion said. By not saying when its net bond purchases will fall to zero, the ECB hopes to underline that there is no preset course for its stimulus program, and that any changes remain dependent on economic data, with a special focus on wages, the sources added.

Commodity Trading Advisor Woes Continue In 2017 (Price Action Lab)
CTAs should not rely on returns from many years ago when pit traders dominated. The world has changed and they must also change. The large returns of the 1980s are not coming back. There are not enough counterparties willing to lose to CTAs at this point. In the past most gains came from random traders using naive technical analysis (chart patterns, simple indicators, etc.) Nowadays most of those recreational traders are already ruined.

Hedge fund CEO busted for kids’ underage boozefest at his mansion (NYP)
The May 30 party involved 24 young people, plus beer pong, to celebrate their graduation from posh private school St. George’s in Newport, RI, where tuition runs to $60,000 a year. After the teen was taken to the hospital, police went to Vos’ home at 2 a.m. Officer Clinton Jarvis said of the backyard, “I found the remains of an alcohol party, which included the strong odor of alcohol. I observed multiple areas on the patio and lawn covered in vomit.”