We were just about to say that it's been a summer bereft of terrible behavior in The Hamptons.
Without drunken interns, little person-filled "charity" bacchanalias or a David Tepper ATM visit, we were getting borderline depressed about how boring life must be "Out East" this summer. But then - like a shiny, naturally doe-eyed angel - an old friend steps forward to rescue us from the doldrums of late August...
Socialite Lisa Maria Falcone is infuriating Hamptons residents by allowing her thoroughbred horses to freely “dump” on Gibson Beach in Sagaponack, while others are dutifully picking up after their dogs.
Lisa Maria, you've outdone yourself. Literally leaving pounds of shit for your neighbors is the kind of thing we'd celebrate using a prayer hands emoji if we were capable of such technology...or understood emojis.
A resident tells us that the fashionista wife of former hedge fund manager Phil Falcone will “bring eight horses in a truck and ride them on the beach and in the water from 6 p.m. until after sunset with her friends, and then leave without picking up the horse dung.”
You would think that she'd be interested in keeping some of that horseshit. After all, Halloween is right around the corner.
While cleaning up after the horses seems far too stinky for Lisa and pals, they do have time for the finer things.
“They even have a refreshment stand set up.”
Wilbur Falcone could not be reached for comment.