Skip to main content

Winklevii Doing Everything They Can To Suck The Fun Out Of Bitcoins

Do your metaphorical manipulation of your metaphorical currencies on another metaphorical exchange.
  • Author:
  • Updated:
(Getty Images)

(Getty Images)

The Winklevoss twins remain convinced that bitcoins and bitcoin-like things will be for them what Facebook wasn’t: The things that makes them really, really rich, and not merely very rich. After all, bitcoin briefly made them a collective billionaire, which is a thing that doesn’t really exist but which sounds good in a headline, and it’s on its way to maybe doing so again. In spite of their long dedication to the imaginary currency that is not, in fact, a currency, the Winklevii are not cryptoanarchists trying to blow up the system. After all, they are the kind of assholes that wore jackets and ties on Thursday afternoons in college. No, the very large twins want bitcoin to work with the system, the sooner the better so that they can become richer than Mark Zuckerberg on the stuff as soon as possible. As far as the Winklevii are concerned, the more regulation the better—the better to work towards that very specific end, that is. So while other bitcoin exchange founders poured scorn on New York Attorney General Eric Schneiderman’s little test, the Winklevii’s, Gemini, is trying to play the teacher’s pet. To that end, they’d like to make perfectly clear that Gemini is not the place to do one of the only thing one really can with bitcoins, which is to manipulate them. (The other is to steal them, which the Winklevii are also on record as being against.)

Gemini will use Nasdaq’s surveillance software, called SMARTS, to monitor its markets for potentially abusive trading practices…. “We’re doing this because we believe in the importance of creating a rules-based marketplace,” Cameron Winklevoss, president and co-founder of Gemini, said in an interview. “We believe this is where things are headed….”

Nasdaq’s technology monitors real-time market activity and raises alerts if it detects unusual trading patterns. It’s then up to humans to investigate the event and determine whether the traders behind it broke any rules.

Nasdaq is in “active discussions” with a number of other cryptocurrency firms about SMARTS, according to Chief Executive Adena Friedman. “The crypto space is a nice growth area,” she said in an interview Wednesday.

To Catch Bad Actors, Winklevosses’ Bitcoin Exchange Teams Up With Nasdaq [WSJ]


(Getty Images)

Winklevii Planning To Dance On Graves Of Aged Bitcoin Skeptics

It’s the only way since they’ll all be dead when the cryptoverse triumphs under the co-Presidents Winklevoss.

(Getty Images)

The SEC Is So Sued

That is what happens when you cross the Winklevoss twins.

(Getty Images)

Bitcoin Recovery Short-Circuited By Continuing Failure Of Two Very Tall Men

The Winklevii may yet kill that which they claim to love.

(Getty Images)

Cameron Winklevoss Savages Old Case Against Bitcoin With Even Older Joke

What Larry Summers meant to say was that the tall half-billionaire is a “lame, cheesy asshole.”