Skip to main content

There's A Disturbing Lack Of Intern Information Out There

It's #InternSzn

I, like many other interns, hoped the summer of 2018 would be free from inappropriate touching in the wake of the #MeToo movement (don't worry, you can still abuse us mentally and emotionally).

Screen Shot 2018-05-21 at 3.38.54 PM

However, we've hit a bump in the road. Last week interns everywhere were mortified to learn that a certain MD over at Credit Suisse allegedly channeled his inner John Travolta at an awards show and got kinda weird with some of the interns.

I thought to myself, "Isn't it kind of strange that this is the only intern discrepancy we've heard about this summer?"

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying I wish these kinds of situations upon anyone -except ing my freshman year hallmate who peed on my floor while he was blackout. What I'm saying is, these kinds of things typically happen more than once a summer. And it's nowhere near the degree of what allegedly happened at Credit Suisse. Hell, I'm a media intern who is a little too soft, and a lot too stupid, to brave the investment banks internships and I still have to deal with this my editor doing stupid stuff. He just had me spend the first four hours of my day trying to fix a phone he was too spaced out to remember that it broke in March. And this situation pales in comparison to what allegedly happened at Credit Suisse, but one thing remains true, it's someone in a position of power acting like an idiot.

There's definitely an MD or VP out there somewhere who has thrown a latte a little too hard, made a derogatory comment about someone's mother, or got way too sweaty while he was dancing at the bars and decided to remove his shirt. Or maybe it was your fellow interns. Or maybe even you.

These things happen and there's no shame in it. So why not talk about it? It is not like 'real adults' can expect us to be quiet. After six months of corporations pontificating to the general public about the empowering employees through the #MeToo movement, you expect millennials, the generation that openly talks about licking each others' buttholes on social media, to keep quiet about something like this.

Yeah, not a chance.

We need to talk about the grievances against interns as a people. Speak freely. Be brave, Standing together and staying strong in the face of not receiving an offer at the end of the summer is one of the bravest tasks an intern can take on. We must rise against the injustices of coffee orders and bitch boy errands and we must.... Oh who am I kidding, we're just interns and that stuff isn't really that bad.

Secret Intern Diary: Hope everyone gets to enjoy a wonderful Independence Day with the families or whoever decides to tolerate your alcoholic tendencies on the best drinking day of the year. Continue to send in any intern stories and tips, especially about stuff like this, to


Photo: Getty Images.

Intern Licking Credit Suisse I-Banker No Longer A Credit Suisse I-Banker

Paul Dexter is going to have to find new ways to enjoy the summer.

Photo: Getty Images.

Despite Reports, Credit Suisse Is Not Done With Its Sticky Intern-Touching Mess

This is what happens when you try to steal another man's story, Bloomberg.

Screen Shot 2018-05-21 at 3.38.54 PM

Hi, I'm Thad The Intern

I hope I don't end up empty inside like my predecessors (Looking at you, Joe Weisenthal).

Screen Shot 2018-06-13 at 5.41.47 PM

Are You Guys Even Allowed To Read This?

Are we banned at your office? Hello?

Two businessmen fighting on a couch in front of a laptop

Hedge Funds Use Thunderdome Tactic To Recruit Talent

I am a student, not your entertainment.

Would Be KBW Intern Hopes Dave Chappelle Clip Takes Sting Out Of News He's Picking JPM

Funny YouTube clips generally ease the sting of rejection, yes?


Summer Intern Explains Tardiness Was On Account Of Being Forced To Take The Time To Tell His Father Off

Our first submission for summer intern emails has arrived and it's...a really weird one.