Gary Cohn Attempting To Stomp Back All That Mean Stuff He Told Bob Woodward About How Dumb The President Is

What are you even doing, Gary Cohn?

The excerpts from Bob Woodward's new book on the Trump Administration have sent some proverbial shockwaves through...whatever.


Listen, everyone knows that the best parts of the book currently making the rounds are the parts about Gary Cohn living every day in mortal fear that he had to save America in his own, stealing papers from the oval office, accidentally cucking Steve Mnuchin in Trump Tower and explaining the kindergarten basics of monetary policy to the commander-in-chief. In fact, all of it was so vivid and great that we couldn't believe how obvious it was that Gary Cohn cooperated with Woodward on such a deep level.

And apparently, with everything now out in the open, neither can Gary Cohn.

Gary Cohn, former White House economic adviser to President Trump, is taking on Bob Woodward's "Fear" with a statement calling it inaccurate — but is declining to say what specifically Woodward has gotten wrong.

That's right, the deafening stomping sound you hear is The Big Grundle trying to walk back all those things he obviously told Bob Woodward about how apocalyptically stupid and adolescent he found the current leader of the free world to be.

"This book does not accurately portray my experience at the White House," Cohn told Axios in a statement. "I am proud of my service in the Trump Administration, and I continue to support the President and his economic agenda."

To be frank, we're almost surprised that Gary is still making a show of fealty to Trumpworld. It's pretty obvious that Cohn left the administration feeling decidedly unsupportive of a large part of the president's economic agenda and was never supportive of the fringe conservative social agenda that he tried to ignore during his tenure. And we won't even delve into the part of Woodward's book that reveals Cohn's daughter had a swastika painted on her dorm room door after Charlottesville, mostly because we can hardly process how Gary stayed on after that, and also because we've said our peace on that.

What is or isn't gospel truth in Woodward's book will be a constant source of debate for likely much longer than we're willing to admit to ourselves, but it's already gotten existentially painful to unravel when the man who was one heartbeat away from running Goldman Sachs is obviously and lazily lying about what he obviously told Bob Woodward about his experience inside the truth-averse Trump administration.

This is Gary's lamest non-denial denial since he got caught between Trump and Nazis.

Scoop: Gary Cohn takes on Bob Woodward [AXIOS]