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Call The Close: Turkey Days

What, is this not how you wanted to spend your holiday week?
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Florida Memory [No restrictions], via Wikimedia Commons

Florida Memory [No restrictions], via Wikimedia Commons

As far as the markets are concerned the last 10-and-a-half months never happened, and as nice as that would have been, we all know that they rather unfortunately did happen and that we are all poorer for them, and not just in our 401(k)s.

In recent trading, the S&P 500 dropped 1.9%, the Dow Jones Industrial Average fell 2.1%, or 546 points, while the Nasdaq Composite declined 2.4%, putting all three on track to close in the red for the year. The Nasdaq closed Monday below its Oct. 29 low, while the S&P 500 and Dow industrials slipped Tuesday intraday below their October troughs.

How much fun is this going to make your flight back to whatever economically-depressed Trump-voting Midwestern suburb that spawned you? How much extra whiskey will you have to drink to cope with the dual intolerabilities of family and ongoing market collapse? Those are all interesting questions, but not the one we are asking today. What we want to know is: How big a hole will we dig ourselves for the final sprint?

You know the way this works: Guesses on the Dow close in by 3:45 p.m. EST TOMORROW (that is Wednesday, Nov. 21). Price is Right rules: Closest without going over wins, with a fun twist for today: Give us a Nasdaq close as a tie-breaker, in the almost hilariously unlikely event that we need one, but mostly for fun. And this is for fun. Winner gets nothing other than the most precious thing in the world at this time of year: Something, anything to be thankful for in the blistering hellscape that is reality in November 2018.

U.S. Stocks Give Up 2018 Gains as Tech Selloff Spreads [WSJ]



Call The Close: Well This Is Fun, Isn’t It?

You wanted volatility? You got it! Now guess how much.

(marolse3 via eBay.)

Call the Close: Dow 20,000, Take Two

You people better get to work.

(marolse3 via eBay.)

UPDATE: Call The Close: Nice Round Number Edition