If you work for Goldman Sachs, you have a voicemail to check.
This is David. The events around 1MDB have given rise to criticism of the firm and speculation in the press about the impending results of the various ongoing investigations.….
The government’s actions against these individuals have generated speculation about potential outcomes for the firm. To be clear, any speculation in the press or elsewhere is completely unfounded.
You should be assured that Goldman Sachs will continue to hold itself to the strongest standards…. A group of people, including some of us in the Executive Office, are intensely focused on this matter. For the rest of us, our job is to focus on our clients, our business and the many opportunities ahead.
In other words—and for the first and only time—ignore the EDM DJ behind the curtain! And also that thing that group of people said about “significant fines, penalties and other sanctions.” That kind of completely unfounded speculation only belongs in a regulatory filing, and not in the press, and certainly not on the lips of any of the Elect.
We’re sure you’re resting well assured that Goldman will maintain the same strong standards that allowed a few of rogue bankers or regular Goldman bankers, depending on which story you wish to tell, to help some foreign officials steal and launder a couple of billion dollars. Now, to quote Bill Belichick—and not because he plays fast and loose with the rules—do your job. Also, Thanksgiving is cancelled. See you Thursday morning bright and early or else.