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Just Remember That Whatever Happens Tonight, The Bond Market Is F@cked

Happy Election Day, monsters.

A Democratic house won't allow entitlements to die, a GOP Congress won't stop spending or cutting taxes, the cocaine effects of the tax cut will wear off soon, economic growth is logically peaking,Ariana Grande dumped Pete Davidson, there will be no infrastructure spending regardless of who wins, Bill Gross hasn't seen his shadow in months, Trump is still president, and the Fed has utterly lost control.


But by all means enjoy that sticker, you sick fucks.



Of Course Steve Mnuchin Is Going To Saudi Arabia

We can think of no better situation for Secretary Mouthbreather than an empty business conference hosted by a totalitarian state pretending that it hasn't murdered anybody.

This is just the appetizer.

Nothing Could Possibly Go Wrong If Elon Musk Is Chosen To Rebuild Puerto Rico's Power Grid

A new Puerto Rican bond issue predicated on Messianic faith in Elon seems like a can't miss!

(Trump image courtesy Flickr user Gage Skidmore)

Good Job, Everybody!

Strong start to the week, you guys.

(Trump image courtesy Flickr user Gage Skidmore)

White House Now Offering Sweet 2-For-1 Deal On Intractable Trade Wars Just In Time For Summer

With China willing to burn it all down, is this not a perfect time to f*ck with Mexico?

wilbur ross slipper king

Donald Trump Confirms Via Twitter That Wilbur Ross Is An Inveterate Liar

Happy "About-To-Be-Independence Day" to The Slipper King.


The President Is Just Doing Some Light Securities Fraud

And sources are reportedly saying that he'll lay off the heavier stuff.