Today is January 29. Two months from now, on March 29, the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland is set to leave the European Union. And after two long and arduous years hammering out the only amicable divorce agreement possible, the people who brought you Brexit and all of the cakes and unicorns and rainbows and free money it was to achieve decided that, since the deal didn’t do those things, since nothing ever could, they’d pick up their toys and go home, by which we mean back to their constituencies to continue lying to people, specifically the lie that when the rubber hits the road, the French and the Germans would fold like, uh, the French usually fold in the face of the Germans, and bring the Irish along, too, and then, truly, Britain could have its unicorn cake and eat it, too. And they would toast all of it with a fine ale in a proper Imperial pint glass unsullied by any Continental decimal measurements, alongside the all-you-can-eat unicorn cakes, and also it would never again be gray or rainy north of the Channel.
In that world, obviously a magical deal can be slapped together in two months. Less, really. And even by someone as patently unfit for her job as Theresa May? Why not?
British Prime Minister Theresa May intends to reopen Brexit negotiations with the European Union, she said Tuesday, in a high-stakes bid to wring concessions as the clock runs down to the U.K.’s exit from the bloc…. After British lawmakers voted down the agreement by a historic margin earlier this month, Mrs. May said she had no option but to go back to the negotiating table.
Sure, the EU says they won’t be renegotiating anything, least of all the so-called Irish backstop that is seen both as necessary to prevent that island from once again descending into sectarian violence and also absolutely unacceptable to a substantial chunk of May’s party. And since, as ever, its party before country or rationality with the Tories, that’ll have to do, and since we’re already playing in a fantasy land, why not?
Mrs. May is maneuvering to stop her Conservative party descending into civil war over Brexit. But her move could backfire. If negotiations are restarted, the U.K. risks reopening questions it once thought settled, including issues such as the status of Gibraltar, a British territory claimed by Spain.