Never tweet, even if it's your literal job.

We don't usually prognosticate specific layoffs here at Dealbreaker dot com, but sometimes we see something that cannot be ignored. Take, for instance, this tweet from Chase Bank:

Screen Shot 2019-04-29 at 2.22.28 PM

This tweet isn't bad so much as it is mindbogglingly awful. In fact, it was taken down while we were writing this, so the screengrab above will be one of the few places that it lives on in infamy. 

Aside from the utterly tone-deaf absurdist voice crafted by a millennial moron who thinks dialogue tweets are funny [dipshit], this tweet was also very dumb and goes counter to the whole notion that JPMorgan Chase is trying to not talk down to the poors. And one person who will definitely be a little irked that this tweet was conceived, composed, edited and posted by a team of supposed social media professionals is the CEO of JPMorgan Chase who made $31 million last year and has been talking about the perils of capitalism. Jamie Dimon doesn't want it out there that he thinks poverty-stricken plebes should eat the leftover trash in their fridges.

Honest to Dril, what was this? What was the conceivable upside? This is the kind of tweet we expect from Wells Fargo.

Here would be our edit:

You: why is my balance so low 

Bank account: make coffee at home stupid 

Bank account: eat the food that’s already in the fridge fatty

Bank account: you don’t need a cab, it’s only three blocks fatty fatty

You: Wow, bank account, you're an asshole I'm going with Citi

Bank account: seriously? 

Jamie Dimon: I want the security passes and firstborn child of every choad in our social media group

#MondayMotivation

So pack your shit, Chase social media team, and plan on making coffee at home for the next few months...you fucking idiots.

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