It's been awhile since we checked in on the billionaire space race, but those wacky tres comma Mars fetishists are at it again.
A few hours after Jeff Bezos unveiled his new Blue Origin moon lander at a big presentation yesterday that outlined his vision of colonizing space via networks of spaceships and planetary settlements [ed note: how is this a fucking sentence?], he was met with a fun tweet by his space rival and fellow billionaire tech playboy, Elon Musk:
Okay, we have been pretty clear in the past that the whole optics of two ultra-wealthy nerds spending absurd amounts of money building phalluses that they shoot into space is a little too on the nose for us, but this tweet is the best thing that we've seen in many moons.
Elon is doing the work here. He's unsubtly acknowledging that this whole rivalry has an obvious dick-size component while also tipping his cap to Bezos. And we also enjoy how Elon took the generous, accidental comedic mega-gift of Bezos using his staggeringly phallic rockets to drop his Blue Balls on the moon, and just deftly fucked around with it. We don't say this a lot about Elon's social media habits, but we admire the nuance and restraint.
Now we await video of Bezos shooting one of his space penises directly into the Tesla that Elon sent into orbit around the Earth [ed note: again, what are we even doing here?]