Sure, the major indices are at record levels and like everyone has a job in an America that wants WeWork to go public, but none of that matter because we can prove to you that the next great recession is already upon us:

Turn those SPY puts into gold, use your LYFT stock to buy canned food and a gun, and get to the bunker, because Manhattan real estate is the first casualty of the economic doomsday that is now upon us. We await the Goldman Sachs note on this harbinger of the end times.