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A month ago, we found ourselves shocked to hear someone claiming religious discrimination and thinking it rang sorta true. The alleged victim, who divides his time between his twin callings of priest and hedge fund manager with a gift for prophecy (albeit an incomplete one), produced noted that his persecutors, Ligard Pharmaceuticals—whose shares Emmanuel Lemelson had shorted and then trashed—insisted he needed to be “silenced for good” and played up his God-bothering in lobbying the SEC for action, which it finally gave into back in 2018.

The only problem was, we weren’t supposed to know any of that just yet.

After hearing on the SEC’s Motion pursuant to Fed. R. Civ. P. 37, I find that Defendants are in contempt of this Court’s Protective Orders. Defendant Lemelson concedes that he violated this order by giving a journalist at Barron’s copies of materials deemed confidential under the Protective Orders…. Defendants shall not take any position in Ligand stock, or its derivatives, for the duration of this action, including appeals…. Defendants shall pay a penalty of $100 per page of the confidential discovery materials disclosed in violation of this Court’s Protective Orders within 30 days.

Render unto Caesar, Father Lemelson.

Hedge Fund Priest Sanctioned Over Press Leaks in SEC Case [Bloomberg Law]


ten commandents

Priestly Hedge Fund Manager Broke Ninth Commandment, But Crucially Not The Eighth

This is an important distinction in the annals of securities law.

(Getty Images)

For Once, Guy Claiming Religious Discrimination May Be On To Something

Emmanuel Lemelson may not have the power of prophecy he claims, but he sure does seem to have gotten jobbed by the SEC and a company he shorted.

By Chris Potter (Flickr: 3D Judges Gavel) [CC BY 2.0], via Wikimedia Commons

Judge Decides He Won’t Resentence His Friend’s Son’s Former Hedge Fund Colleague

On second glance, yea, Alvin Hellerstein understands why you might think there’s a conflict of interest here.

By Chris Potter (Flickr: 3D Judges Gavel) [CC BY 2.0], via Wikimedia Commons

Former Hedge Fund Manager Self-Fulfills Prison Prophecy

Dan Kamensky may go from predicting jailtime to getting it in less than a year.

By Chris Potter (Flickr: 3D Judges Gavel) [CC BY 2.0], via Wikimedia Commons

Ex-Hedge Fund Manager Better Hope The Next Judge He Sees Doesn’t Think He’s A Thief And A Liar

Because that judge will be the one fulfilling his prophecy about going to jail.

By Chris Potter (Flickr: 3D Judges Gavel) [CC BY 2.0], via Wikimedia Commons

Hedge Fund Manager In Jail For Ponzi Scheming Won’t Get Out For Lawyer’s Horndogging

Keenan Hauke’s attorney may have been blinded by desire for his client’s wife, but Hauke should have said something about that earlier.