Here’s a fun little fact about fake currencies: Creating or trading or pretty much doing anything with the revolutionary “coins” and tokens that hope to one day replace real money requires lots and lots and lots of the thing they aim to destroy.

“We want to ensure that we maintain those cash reserves so that we can continue to invest and continue to grow our products and services in the event that we go into a crypto winter,” [Coinbase CFO Alesia] Haas said…. The strong results also have bolstered Coinbase’s cash balance, which stood at $4.36 billion as of June 30, or about four-times higher than at the end of 2020.

Roughly half of Tether’s $62.8 billion in assets were held in commercial paper and certificates of deposit, according to a report the company published Monday…. The report said that 24% of its assets were in Treasury bills—considered among the safest to hold—up from about 2.2% detailed in May. The other roughly quarter of the reserves are held in a mix of corporate bonds, cash and small deposits.

“It’s nice to have that ability for rainy days," D.A. Davidson analyst Chris Brendler says of Coinbase’s horde, and its true, as Binance (and, for that matter, Tether itself) have learned.

Binance said on Wednesday it had appointed a former U.S. Treasury criminal investigator as its global money laundering reporting officer, part of an attempt by one of the world's largest crypto exchanges to reinvent itself as a regulated financial firm…. "My efforts will be focused on expanding Binance’s international anti-money laundering and investigation programs, as well as strengthening the organization’s relations with regulatory and law enforcement bodies worldwide,” Greg Monahan, the new appointee, said in a statement.

Speaking of crypto-ironies, here’s noted welcomer-of-competition Facebook discussing its own digital dollar difficulties.

“I’ve heard multiple conversations about how this proposal would be so great if only Facebook wasn’t involved,” [Facebook financial services chief David Marcus] said. “I understand and accept the need for extra scrutiny due to our scale….” Facebook’s digital wallet is ready to come to market, Mr. Marcus said, and “we deserve a fair shot.”

Coinbase Builds a $4 Billion Cash Pile To Weather Tighter Regulation, Crypto Risks [WSJ]
Tether Says Massive Reserves Held in Investment-Grade Commercial Paper [WSJ]
Crypto exchange Binance hires former US Treasury criminal investigator [Reuters]
Facebook says it wants a ‘fair shot’ in the crypto payments sphere. [NYT]

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By AntanaCoins (Own work) [CC BY-SA 3.0], via Wikimedia Commons

Fake Currency Exchange Acquires Actual Broker-Dealer License

Coinbase is going straight for some reason.

By Jdarsie11 [CC BY-SA 4.0 ], from Wikimedia Commons

The Mooch Has Big, Fake Things To Announce As His Less-Big-Than-Usual Party

The highlight of this year’s SALT conference make by Skybridge’s latest attempt to lose money in crypto.


If You Believe Walmart Is About To Begin Accepting Litecoin, Well, I’ve Got Some, Uh, Litecoin To Sell You

The old is new again and again and again. And Steve Cohen and Cathie Wood want more of it.

By US government [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

Gary Gensler Stands Astride History Yelling Stop

Actually, he’s not saying anything. Just suing.

By Mike Cauldwell ( [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

Largest Crypto Exchange Banned From Britain, Hottest Digital Token Tanks, Bitcoin Soars, Rinse, Repeat

For something so volatile and theoretically interesting, the not-particularly-trying trials of faux currencies are actually quite boring.